


Care and feeding of Lieutenant Commander Steven J. McGarrett, USNR

by darkmoore



Series: All it took was a parking garage [2]
Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010), The Sentinel
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Alternate Universe - Sentinels & Guides, Alternate Universe - Sentinels and Guides Are Known, Anal Sex, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bonding, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Sentinel Senses, Sentinel/Guide, Sentinel/Guide Bonding, Spirit Animals
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-21
Updated: 2016-07-21
Packaged: 2018-07-25 19:41:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 27,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7545505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/darkmoore/pseuds/darkmoore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It took a parking garage falling onto Steve's head to bring out the Sentinel in him. It took Steve coming online for Danny to be able to claim his place as a Guide. But things are never as easy as they appear to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Care and feeding of Lieutenant Commander Steven J. McGarrett, USNR

**Author's Note:**

> So, I finished this after all, encouraged to do so by the WIP Big Bang comm over at LJ. It's been a struggle to say the least and I was almost ready to give up on it altogether. But I didn't and I'm glad it's done now. A huge, HUGE THANK YOU goes to **Brumeier** who encouraged me and pushed me and did a speed beta on the last possible moment. Thank you love, I owe you. Also a big THANK YOU to [Taste_is_Sweet](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Taste_is_Sweet) who spontaneously made some gorgeous art for my fic (featured within this story), in addition to my "regular" artist, Alobear. **Taste** , you rock!

The ringing in his ears was killing Steve. He felt disoriented and nauseous, and, judging by the sharp, stabbing pain and the wetness seeping out of his left ear, he was reasonably certain that he’d busted his eardrum in addition to having a concussion. Taking a deep breath prompted a cough that hurt not only his ribs but all of his body, reverberating in his bones like an echo in an empty hall. Steve slowly opened his eyes and blinked a couple of times to banish the sticky film of grime that blurred his vision. What little light there was hurt his eyes and sent new spikes of pain through his head. He fought hard not to throw up.

He sat up carefully, shoving rubble off of his chest and thighs as he went, while taking shallow breaths to get his nausea under control – and to not start another round of coughing. The last thing he needed was to worsen any of his injuries if he wanted to get out there alive. Wherever _there_ was. Steve still had problems with his vision, and the room seemed to tilt and spin at an alarming rate. He was in deep shit this time – that much he knew. His SEAL training might have kept him alive in other situations, but he was pretty sure that being buried under a couple metric tons of rubble could have easily killed him – SEAL or not. 

Steve tried to remember what his mission was, what he had come to do, where he was, and if he’d been alone. He came up blank. Every time he tried to concentrate on the hows and whys of his operation another wave of stabbing, white hot pain shot through his head and threatened to topple him over. He was used to pain, had been trained to endure it and push through it, to withstand torture; retrograde amnesia, however, would be a real bitch to deal with. 

Finally the room stopped spinning quite so badly, and Steve staggered to his feet, trying to survey his surroundings. The space he found himself in was covered in fine, white concrete dust that still hung in the air and made breathing incredibly hard. The remnants of what seemed to have been some sort of storage area were completely trashed. There were pieces of the support beams, huge chunks of concrete, and other debris strewn around. Steve still had no clue where he was. 

He found the fresh body when he half crawled, half stepped over another huge pile of rubble. Seeing the man lying there didn’t jog his memory at all, but the smell of fresh decay was almost too much for Steve, as he fought down his nausea once more. Something was nagging in the back of his mind, something about the way he could smell the rotting corpse, even though it was no doubt still warm. Something about the way he could make out the odor of fear beneath the stomach turning stench of dead body. Steve couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something important he was missing. 

The corpse held no answers for him, so Steve slowly made his way forward. The building all around him was still shifting and groaning under the strain of the collapsed sections, and Steve knew he needed to get out quickly. He really didn’t want to die underneath all that rubble. 

There was movement somewhere to his right, and Steve tilted his head towards the sound. It was subtle and he had to strain his hearing to catch it, but that was definitely breathing and the faint sounds of debris being moved. The cough that broke the relative silence nearly took out Steve’s hearing again; it seemed to be that loud. Steve squeezed his eyes shut and clenched his jaw, riding the wave of pain that coursed through his head and pooled hotly in his stomach. If only the nausea would go away. 

“Steve?” the voice was hoarse and thin, strained to a point where it was barely audible; the relief Steve felt at hearing it almost made him stagger. Suddenly memories came crashing in on him, painful and vivid, complete in HD and Dolby surround sound. Being set up. The word ‘bomb’ before there was a blast, and then nothing but confusion and pain and so much noise. And before … before he and Danny …

Danny!

He needed to get to Danny. Needed to make sure that his partner, his best friend, his … Danny … was all right. Steve moved as fast as his aching body – and the annoying white particles still floating around in the air – allowed, searching for where Danny had landed after the blast. 

“Danny!” Steve called out, torn between the concern of making too much noise and risking bringing the rest of the unstable building down on them, and the need to let his friend know he was okay and coming for him. If only he could see more clearly. But the weird sort of light filtering in and the white dust, combined with his stinging eyes and strangely inconsistent vision, made it hard to navigate the uneven space all around him. 

Maybe he should try listening for Danny again. 

“Steve, ‘m here,” Danny said, followed by a pained sounding cough, and Steve turned in the direction of the noise. He needed to get to Danny, now. Steve cleared away some rubble and clambered over a pile of steel and concrete, causing a few small pieces of concrete to roll towards where Danny was lying on his back, covering his face with his arm. 

Another cloud of white dust billowed up, making it impossible for Steve to see for a second. He bit back a curse and concentrated on reaching Danny instead. They needed to get out, as soon as possible, and Steve just hoped that Danny wasn’t hurt too badly. Their chances of getting out alive were already questionable. 

Finally Steve managed to make his way over to his partner, who slowly lifted his arm away from his face with an unhappy frown. He was completely covered in concrete dust, and his breathing sounded labored and off somehow. 

“My leg is stuck,” Danny said, and tried to sit up anyway, causing small pieces of rubble to roll off his chest. Something in his voice made Steve shudder but he couldn’t pinpoint what exactly it was. Not that it mattered, because getting both of them out had to take top priority over anything else. 

“Don’t move, I’ll get it,” he hissed at Danny, and felt around the edges of the piece of concrete that had landed on Danny’s right calf. He quickly and efficiently checked for any obvious injuries like bones breaching the skin or excessive bleeding, but luckily found none. If there was an injury, he’d only be able to make it out after having lifted off the piece of ceiling that had landed on Danny. 

Steve shifted his stance, and once he’d found a good position he grabbed the piece of concrete tightly and pulled. It gave way far more easily than Steve had anticipated, and he quickly dropped it to the side. Steve had always had an excellent adrenaline response, but the ease with which he had lifted the fairly large chunk of concrete startled even him. Danny seemed to have noticed, too. 

“Whoa. Easy there, babe. No need to go all super SEAL on me. I’m okay. Just a few banged up ribs and a bump to my thick skull. Nothing to worry about.” He pushed upright with a suppressed groan, Steve watching with concern. There was a strong urge to touch Danny, to make sure he was really okay, to _check_ him over, thoroughly. As if Steve would be able to discern if Danny really was in trouble just by laying hands on him. It was an urge Steve wasn’t prepared to fight, so he didn’t.

“Let me have a look at your chest,” Steve ordered in his team leader voice, brooking no argument. Danny of course ignored him. It wasn’t as if that was anything new. There was a reason that people kept comparing them to an old married couple. 

“I said I’m fine, Steve, let’s just get out of here before the whole building comes down on us,” Danny said stubbornly, and tried to push to his feet while holding his right side. Steve would have none of it. 

“Let me have a look at your chest, Danny, I’m not going to ask again.” Steve grabbed for Danny’s tac vest. He undid the Velcro straps and pushed it to the side, ignoring Danny’s protests. He needed to see for himself that the injuries weren’t life threatening. 

Danny made an unhappy sound but gave up his attempts to bat Steve’s hands away. Steve ripped Danny’s shirt open, the warmth of Danny’s skin seeping through the fabric oddly comforting to him. Steve had no idea what was going on, but he suspected that the blow to the head he’d sustained might have been a bit more severe than he’d thought at first, when something as simple as his partner’s body heat helped him focus. 

There was a huge, blackish-blue bruise forming at the lower part of Danny’s ribcage, but a quick, careful touch to his skin told Steve that the ribs were mostly fine. One of them seemed to be partially broken, another two severely bruised, which of course didn’t mean they hurt any less, but at least Steve didn’t have to worry about the possibility of a fractured rib puncturing and collapsing a lung. 

Just when he was about to help Danny get up, Steve felt a vibration run through the building and heard the faint rush of sliding rubble. Steve grabbed Danny and hauled him to the side, rolling them so that he covered Danny’s body as much as possible while making sure that Danny didn’t hurt his head again. 

Small pieces of rubble hit Steve’s back, but it barely registered; he was too busy shielding Danny from the worst of the falling debris. His only concern lay with Danny and his safety. Beside them, a huge chunk of concrete hit the space where Danny had just been lying, but after a moment the building seemed to somewhat settle down again. Steve concentrated on the groaning, shifting sounds of the beams and structures nearby, before he reluctantly moved away from Danny. 

“That was close. Thanks, babe,” Danny said as he let himself be helped up. Steve didn’t say anything. Something strange was going on with him. He was suffering from some sort of tunnel-vision phenomenon, but it seemed to be connected to Danny somehow. Things got a little hazy after that. The only thing that never changed was the thought of _Keep Danny safe_ that was stuck in his head in an endless loop, like some sort of weird mantra. 

Steve couldn’t exactly recall how they made it out of there. The urgency he felt to get Danny away from there, to safety, was unlike anything he had ever felt before. It should have worried him, but g he was incapable of caring about his own issues while he was in that haze. All that mattered was that no further harm would come to Danny. 

They must have gotten out somehow, because the next thing Steve remembered was Danny in a hospital bed, right next to his own. They’d been patched up and cleaned, and were to spend a night and part of the next day for observation. At least Steve thought that was what the doctors had said. It didn’t really matter. Danny’s heartbeat was strong and steady, and if Steve reached out, he could have touched Danny’s arm. He still smelled _off_ somehow, but that was likely due to the explosion and whatever the hospital had used to clean the debris and dust off them. It would have to do, because underneath all that _wrongawfulirritating_ scent there was what Steve associated with just _Danny_ and that was enough to let him slip into a doze. 

Danny was safe.

* * *

“Did Steve seem off to you?” Danny asked Kono. She had come to pick him up and drop him off at his apartment, since Steve had been released more than an hour earlier. The doctors just wanted to have one last look at Danny’s ribs which, thanks to his Guide physiology and the resulting partially accelerated healing, were already starting to mend. Danny might not be able to work as a Guide, but that didn’t mean that his physiology wasn’t still that of a Guide, with all the perks and drawbacks it entailed. 

“What do you mean?” she asked, clearly confused by his question. “From what I’ve seen he’s been his usual stoic self, maybe a bit angrier than usual. Not that I blame him – a parking garage fell onto your heads. I get that he’s pissed and wants some answers. I hope he takes that rest the doctor ordered. He’s not invulnerable, no matter what he likes to think.”

“Hm. All right. If you say so.” Danny rubbed the back of his neck. Something was going on with Steve, but he hadn’t figured out yet what exactly that was. Even the nurses had commented on how fixated Steve had been on him. How he kept touching Danny’s arm. And while it wasn’t that uncommon that they ended up together in a room, Steve usually wasn’t that tactile or that over-concerned. Danny had been way worse off than just a minor concussion and bruised ribs, and Steve had made less of a fuss. 

It didn’t really make sense. 

Or rather, it didn’t make sense for Steve. If it had been someone else, someone who might have been a latent Sentinel, Danny might have thought that the unusual behavior could have been caused by the person’s reaction to a Guide in danger. But Danny had an iron grip on his shields and he never slipped up. Danny knew his own abilities; he wasn’t projecting, he wasn’t reading anyone. Hell, he wouldn’t even feel like a Guide, except maybe to online Sentinels, so that theory was void. And of course Steve wasn’t latent. That’s something that would have been in his file – and something he would have told his team, his _ohana_. No, there had to be another explanation. 

The only problem was that the hospital staff had noticed Steve’s behavior too, and that was something Danny needed to think through. Was it possible Steve had kept such a huge secret from them? It was a security risk for him, and everyone around him, to keep a latent status hidden. A latent Sentinel could come online as feral in the middle of a combat situation, and if no-one knew what was happening, wrong conclusions could be made and someone could end up dead. 

Steve wouldn’t do that to them.

He might take unnecessary risks with his own life, but he would never knowingly put his team or, God forbid, the civilians he worked with in danger. Danny decided to give it some time and then investigate. He needed rest so his advanced healing could kick in properly and breathing could stop hurting so much. His head was killing him, too. Danny had refused anything stronger than low level painkillers; the fact that he would have had to stay in the hospital if he’d accepted stronger ones was only part of the reason. He just needed rest – preferably in his own bed. 

When Kono finally dropped him off at his apartment, Danny thanked her and went straight to bed, determined to hunt down his partner and get answers as soon as he was feeling up to it. Until then, he needed to rest and heal. He’d need all of his strength for his talk with Steve.

* * *

Steve stumbled into his bedroom, carefully shielding his eyes. For the first time in his life he resented the fact that there were only curtains and no real blackout shades he could draw. The light was hurting his eyes and the usually pleasant, relaxing sound of waves coming from the beach was so loud it felt like someone had racked the volume of a stereo up to the max. Staggering his way over to the window, Steve shut it and drew the curtains closed, frustrated at the lack of any noticeable improvement. 

A feeling of dread was making its way up Steve’s spine, like his body was telling him things were about to go FUBAR really damn fast. Everything was _off_. Steve’s skin felt too tight, somewhere between sunburned and chafed raw, and there was an itch starting at the inside of his left elbow. His head was pounding, ears ringing and eyes watering from the too bright light, while the smell in the room made him feel nauseous. It smelled like Catherine, only worse. Too much, too harsh, too … something. 

Impatiently, Steve ripped the sheets off the bed and threw them out of the room, not caring where they landed in the hallway. He stripped off his clothes, too, the fabric like acid on his already burning skin. He was no stranger to pain, but this was something else. It was something that seriously threw him off kilter. It wasn’t just pain. It was so much more. Steve couldn’t really describe the sensations assaulting his body, but they were unlike anything he had ever experienced. It sucked. 

At a loss what to do, but figuring waiting and riding out the pain was a tried and true method, Steve grabbed two fresh sheets from the closet. He threw one over the bare mattress, not caring to tuck it in, and wrapped the other loosely around his naked body, hoping that whatever was wrong with him would pass. If it was something really bad, surely they’d have found it while he was at the hospital. 

With that thought Steve curled up on his bed, covered his eyes and ears as well as he could, and settled in to wait.

* * *

Danny had hoped he was wrong, but the second he entered Steve’s bedroom he knew he wasn’t. Steve was lying on his bed, curled up in a fetal position, eyes clenched shut tightly and arms over his ears with his fingers linked at the back of his head. He was drenched in sweat with a light, white sheet barely covering his hips and legs. If Danny hadn’t already been convinced that he was looking at a Sentinel in distress, the huge white tiger pacing back and forth agitatedly beside Steve’s bed would have been a dead giveaway. The blue eyes of the spirit animal seemed to bore into Danny as he slowly approached Steve. 

There was no room for mistakes, Danny knew that. Steve had been fine not twenty-four hours ago at the hospital. In a hospital room they had shared. That, in addition to the fact that Danny could see Steve’s spirit animal as clearly as he had once been able to see his own, could only mean one thing: the Sentinel part of Steve had deemed Danny an acceptable match as a Guide and had started a partial imprint on him. 

Great, just fucking great. As if unrequited love wasn’t enough to deal with already. Danny didn’t want to imagine the emotional fallout this whole situation would bring. Searching for another possible match while Steve was suffering so much already was not an option, though; seeing Steve like in such a state was hard enough already. Danny took a deep breath and tried the recall all of the lessons the Center had forced on him over twenty years ago. There’d been mandatory classes no matter the fact that Danny had been deemed ‘unmatchable’ by then. 

Crouching down so he would be able to look Steve in the eyes, Danny did something he hadn’t done since he’d been a teenager: he thinned his previously impermeable primary shield and gently reached out to Steven empathically. A plethora of feelings and impressions rushed over Danny and took his breath away for a second, as he opened himself up to all of his surroundings. That was the reason Danny never released his ironclad defenses, ever. Not even for Grace. Not even when he wanted nothing more than to experience the love his daughter was giving so freely in a more direct way. But he’d done it now. To save Steve.

He mentally reached out to Steve’s mind in the same moment as he carefully placed a hand on Steve’s left forearm. The touch was barely there but Danny could feel the echo of the pain, the almost unbearable agony it caused Steve, and he pushed at it viciously. He needed to touch Steve in order to help him. The skin on skin contact had the desired effect almost immediately. Some of the tension bled out of Steve’s shoulders and arms, and he relaxed minutely. Another push at the pain raging through Steve’s body, and his mind started to clear as well. 

“Sentinel,” Danny said in a low voice. “I need you to focus on me now. Focus on me.” He took Steve’s arm in a careful grip and gently tugged it away from his head. “Focus, Steven. Come on. I know you can do it, babe.” The use of his nickname had Steve’s eyes snapping open. Danny grinned. That was much better. 

“Hey there, looks like you’ve had a bit of a rough day,” Danny said, and smiled at Steve, his firm mental push never letting up. Steve had no defenses of his own yet, and should Danny pull back, Steve would return to his almost catatonic state. 

“Danny?” Steve asked, sounding hoarse. He slowly let his arms sink and blinked a couple of times. “Hurts. Can’t remember why it hurts. What happened?” he slurred, clearly fighting to keep his eyes open. 

A fresh wave of pain coursed through Steve’s body and Danny could see him clench his jaw tightly against it as he wrapped his arms around his middle and pulled his legs up. He shivered as if cold, and Danny realized that the sweat cooling on his body most likely irritated Steve’s currently hypersensitive skin. He needed more grounding. And he needed actual shields, not just Danny holding the worst of the sensory onslaught at bay. But to build shields of his own Steve would need to be more coherent. 

“Long story, babe. Come on, let’s see if I can help with the pain.” Danny stood. He toed off his shoes, tugged his shirt out of his pants and quickly pulled it over his head. A little more skin on skin contact – and some body heat – might do the trick. Danny tried to ignore the fact that Steve was stark naked under the flimsy sheet as he slid into bed and gently wrapped his arms around Steve from behind, keeping his hands way above the waistline. Steve jerked at the touch, but as soon as Danny’s naked arms touched his torso he relaxed. 

Danny tried to remember how he might be able to trigger Steve into building his own shields, but couldn’t quite work out the technicalities. Instead he opted for wrapping Steve up in his shields for the time being, shutting out most of the sensory input Steve had to deal with and thereby minimizing the strain on his senses. It felt … very intimate. 

“What are you doing?” Steve sounded confused and absolutely exhausted, but at least he wasn’t in pain any more. Danny could tell by the way his body relaxed, and the feedback he received from the mental connection. Now, if Steve could actually manage a basic shield, things would start to get a lot easier. He could talk Steve through some easy exercises to stabilize him, and then they could get him to the Center. 

The thought sent a trickle of ice down Danny’s spine but he ignored it. Steve needed to go to the Center to get help with his senses and to get a proper Guide to bond with, not some cast-off who had been deemed unmatchable since his teenage years. Danny would go back to being Steve’s best friend while someone else would bond with Steve and help him discover all the exciting things he could do with his Sentinel senses. It would be okay. _They_ would be okay. They had to be.

Another shiver went down Danny’s spine, as if someone had breathed ice down his back. 

“You’re making me cold!” Steve complained. Guiltily Danny realized he had slipped up and allowed his feeling of unease to get through to Steve. 

“Sorry Steve, I got distracted,” Danny apologized, and carefully ran a hand down Steve’s left arm, soothing him. There were patches of red, angry-looking skin, and some hives at the inside of his elbow and higher up where neck met shoulder. Danny would have liked to have a better look at it but didn’t want to move too much; their close contact was more important at the moment.

The next minutes were spent just lying there, breathing in sync while Danny pushed every bit of spare energy at Steve in the hopes of triggering him into maintaining a shield on his own. When it finally happened Danny had to blink back tears of relief. Steve was gonna be okay. All he needed now was support and training and a proper Guide. Danny concentrated on merging his own, solid shield with the fledgling shield Steve was unconsciously forming, as if to lead by example. If Steve knew what a proper shield felt like, he might be able to maintain it on his own a lot easier. 

After what felt like eternity, Steve shifted to lie on his back and looked at Danny with a serious expression on his face. “You wanna tell me what’s going on here? One minute I’m coming home from the hospital and lying down like the doctor ordered, next thing I know I’m naked in bed with you. Care to explain?” He raised his eyebrows in a typically _Steve_ manner and Danny had to suppress a sigh. 

“It looks like your Sentinel decided to come out and play,” Danny said and hoped he’d get through his explanation before Steve freaked out. “It’s no wonder you’re having such a hard time – coming online like that must have been pretty nasty. If you’d told us that you’re a latent they’d have checked you for signs of distress at the hospital. I’m surprised you didn’t come online before, though. Guess it took getting stuck under a few tons of rubble with me for your Sentinel to finally emerge.” Danny wanted to make it sound light and teasing but failed. If anything it sounded forced.

At least in their current position, Danny was blocking Steve’s view of the spirit animal. The last time Danny had gotten a look at him, the big tiger had settled down on the floor next to the bed, tail twitching on occasion but otherwise content. It had given up pacing around the time Danny had gotten into bed with Steve. 

“I’m not classified as latent,” Steve finally said, and Danny wanted to laugh at his expression. Steve had such an expressive face and right now he looked like someone had tried to pull a nasty joke on him. Only this was no joke but bitter reality. 

“Of course not. As of today you’re an online Sentinel,” Danny agreed easily.

Steve clenched his jaw and closed his eyes for a second before he slowly sat up. “I’ve been classified as a carrier. They said I wouldn’t come online. I’m the first potential Sentinel in my family, ever, and I didn’t come online during training or any mission, and believe me most of them were a lot more stressful than getting buried under a parking garage with my best friend.” Steve seemed to be determined to ignore the fact that he was in a whole lot of trouble. 

Danny sat up and reached over to gently tilt Steve’s head so he could see his neck and the top of his shoulder clearly. “I hate to break it to you, babe, but this pretty rash you’re sporting, and the big ass cat over there say otherwise.” He motioned over his shoulder. “You are most definitely a Sentinel and right now, I’m your Guide. I’m shoring up your shields so you don’t go into sensory overload again. That’s what had you curled up in agony a couple minutes ago.” Danny knew it was a lot to take in but he had to lay it all out there so Steve would understand. 

When Steve turned around and stared at the white tiger in surprise, Danny said, “How about you introduce me to your spirit animal? Only you would end up with the kind of cat that not only likes water but can actually swim quite well. Must be a SEAL thing.” Danny smiled at him encouragingly, and apparently the tiger seemed to agree. It trotted around the end of the bed, and when it reached them sat down, placed its head into Steve’s lap, and closed its eyes in contentment. 

The look on Steve’s face was absolutely priceless. 

He tentatively reached out and touched the tiger’s head, petting him. The tiger chuffed. “I can feel him,” Steve finally said in wonderment, as if it was just now registering that he was dealing with an animal that was made up completely out of psionic energy. There was awe in his tone, and a hell of a lot respect, even though Steve had to know that his spirit animal would never hurt him in any way. 

Danny smiled at him. “Yes, of course you can. He’s linked to you. Most spirit animals like visiting and will drop by regularly. Especially if they feel you’re angry or distressed. They’re sort of like an additional support system. You can call them, too, but it’s really up to them if they show up or not. Oh, and you don’t need to worry about him scaring people away; unless you touch him or he actually decides to be visible for a reason, he’ll be only visible to you and your Guide.” 

Talking about Steve and another Guide felt like a cold hand grabbing his spine but Danny ignored it. Steve had every right to choose a Guide that fit him best, maybe some beautiful woman he could share his life with. Danny would still be his partner and have his back on the job, and everything would be just fine. Now if only Danny could make himself believe it. 

“Is that why you can see him? Because you’re my Guide? And if you can see him, why can’t I see yours?” Steve asked, and gave Danny a calculating look. Something was going on in his head, but Danny couldn’t begin to figure out what it was. 

Danny suppressed a sigh and rubbed his face, taking the opportunity look away from Steve for a moment. Trust him to ask all the hard questions right away. “You can’t see Maya because she’s not here. Don’t think you’ll ever get to meet her, to be honest. She’s mad at me and I haven’t seen her in a while. And I’m not your Guide, Steve. I’m maybe a possible match in the widest sense of the word. Just because you were in so much pain that the Sentinel in you would have made do with any half decent match doesn’t make it a good idea to want me as your Guide. I’m inactive for a reason.”

It was no secret that he was a Guide, and all of his records listed his status as inactive. But Danny knew Steve had never really thought about the hows and whys of it all, never really had a reason to. The confused look Steve gave him spoke volumes about the things he didn’t know. “They banned me from working as a Guide over twenty years ago. That doesn’t just go away all of a sudden. I doubt they would even consider taking me off the blacklist, much less let me get my hands on someone as valuable as you.” The anger and hurt Danny felt at the unjust treatment, even after all these years, was bright and sharp in his chest. He carefully kept it from transmitting to Steve. 

“But why would they do that?” Steve asked, and he sounded irritated now. Danny wasn’t sure if it was because he was annoyed about it on Danny’s behalf, or if the Sentinel in him was reacting to being denied what he was essentially viewing as his rightful Guide in the current situation. 

“I’m not exactly the poster child of calm and controlled, Steven,” Danny snapped. “I wasn’t then and I’m not now. The bitter old lady who evaluated me back then was of the opinion no precious, hallowed Sentinel should be subjected of my special brand of Guiding. She deemed me unmatchable and that was that. I wasn’t allowed to bond and I couldn’t appeal for four years. By then I’d been an outcast for so long, it didn’t really matter anymore.”

It wasn’t the whole truth but close enough, Danny supposed. Even after four years after that initial denial, the pain over losing what he felt was his right and his duty – to bond with a Sentinel – had been fresh and raw. But the prospect of being turned down again, being branded ‘faulty’ and ‘unsuitable’ and ‘irredeemable’ more than once would have broken him completely, that much Danny knew. So in the end he hadn’t appealed. He’d worked relentlessly on building impermeable shields and locking away everything that made him a Guide behind walls upon walls of self-protection and shields so strong not even an online Sentinel would have figured him for an online Guide right away. 

“But it matters to me, Danny!” Steve said angrily, and the tiger on his lap chuffed unhappily. “You were a teenager then. No more than a kid. How can anyone expect you to be calm and collected and perfect Guide material when you’re dealing with growing up and figuring out who you are? That’s completely insane.”

Danny laughed humorlessly. “Yeah, right. Tell that to the Center and their evaluation policies. If it wasn’t for them, you’d actually be able to request me as your Guide. As it is, they’ll conduct a Guide search for you and will present you with the most promising candidates. You’ll meet, and when you click with one of them, you can bond. But until then you’re stuck with me, babe. You need to learn to build and maintain your own shields. Because I gotta tell you, the moment I stop shoring you up, I’m sure they’ll collapse. The fledgling shield you managed to build will never keep all the sensory input at bay. We gotta work on that.” 

Steve seemed to have gone into selective hearing mode because the next thing Danny knew Steve was wrapping his hands around Danny’s upper arms and staring at him, angrily. “You listen to me because I’m only saying this once, Daniel. I will not accept anyone but you as my Guide. It’s the perfect solution. We’re partners already. We’re best friends. We can do the platonic bonding – don’t try to tell me there is no such thing ‘cause that at least I know – and the Center can kiss my ass. I don’t care what they think. The Sentinel in me picked you, that’s gotta be good enough for them. I won’t let them keep you from me.” 

This time Danny did sigh. “I’m not denying you, okay? I’m just saying the Center will most likely try to make you accept a different Guide. You need to be prepared for that possibility. And from what I’m seeing right now, the Sentinel in you won’t like it. So we need to work on your shields before we go down to the Center to register you and see if I can appeal a decision from twenty years ago.” The thought of actually getting to be Steve’s Guide was both exhilarating and terrifying. Even with just a platonic bond Danny would have to carefully keep his feelings for Steve under wraps. If Steve found out that Danny felt anything for him other than brotherly love, it would be detrimental to their bond _and_ their friendship. 

But being Steve’s Guide, having that kind of connection, however small it might be, would be a dream come true. For that chance, Danny didn’t mind that he would have to hide a part of himself. He had enough practice in maintaining impermeable walls that it shouldn’t be a problem to lock his feelings of love behind one of those ironclad shields, and Steve would never be the wiser. But being Steve’s Guide – even if only platonically – would be totally worth the high cost it came with on Danny’s side. 

Something in Steve’s mood had shifted, and now he was carefully taking away his hands from Danny’s arms. His gaze turned pleading. “You want this, right? You want to be my Guide and you’re going to appeal at the Center? Please Danny. I can’t do this without you. I was a mess less than an hour ago and it’s only because of you that I’m even coherent. You have to be my Guide!” 

Danny wasn’t sure what to make of Steve’s sudden mood swing from aggressive Sentinel to needy and clingy best friend, but it couldn’t be anything good. Steve McGarrett didn’t plead, ever. He gave orders and expected them to be followed, but he never got needy or clingy. Never. Still, hearing Steve talk like that was catering to Danny’s inner Guide, which was desperate to be accepted. Danny wasn’t proud of that, but decided to keep his mouth shut for now. Instead he wrapped Steve in a gentle embrace and said, “Of course I want to be your Guide. We’re partners, right? We’re gonna work it out, Steve, but first things first. You’re going to take a shower– with me staying on the other side of the door just in case – and then we’ll see about training you to build the best shields you can manage. They’re going to be so impressed with you at the Center.” 

Steve relaxed in his arms. “All right, partner, whatever you say. You’re the expert.” 

Somehow Danny doubted his Sentinel would always be as agreeable as in that moment.

* * *

Taking a shower proved more of a challenge than Steve had anticipated. When Danny had said that he’d wait on the other side of the door to make sure Steve was okay, it had sounded a bit overprotective and ridiculous, but the moment the first droplets of water his Steve’s skin, he changed his mind. It felt like being pelted by a myriad of scorching hot steel pellets. Steve couldn’t suppress a startled cry of pain as he stumbled away from the showerhead, almost landing on his ass in the process. 

Danny was there with him in a flash; steady hands on his already slippery skin, all confidence. His touch felt like sandpaper for the fraction of a second before something changed and the pain went away completely. The sudden absence of it was almost as startling as the agony itself had been. 

“That went well,” Danny commented drily. He reached over and shut the shower off, without letting go of Steve’s wrist. “Okay, here’s what we’re gonna do,” he said, and he sounded somehow resigned to Steve’s ears. “I’m going to draw you a bath. I will sit with you and keep physical contact to make sure your senses won’t spike again. You will not complain, you will not claim you are fine, and you sure as hell won’t talk me into joining you in the shower instead. So forget about that, right now.” 

The idea of Danny in the shower with him all soaped up and slippery had Steve’s stomach doing a little flip. And if it hadn’t been for the fact that he’d felt like being skinned alive just a moment ago, Steve was pretty sure his excitement would have made itself known in a quite obvious way. Nope, getting an erection when Danny was only offering his help on a purely platonic level would have been a Bad Idea. Capital letters. 

“I’m a SEAL, Danny. I take three minute showers, not hot baths. You sure we can’t do this any other way?” Steve just had to ask. The thought of sitting in the tub, Danny touching him, made Steve uncomfortable, and the feeling of vulnerability that came with it was unwelcome and strange. He was used to being the protector, not the proverbial damsel in distress. Would it always be like that? Would he need Danny for every bit of his life from now on? Be dependent on him? Helpless without him? Was that what his life was going to be like? 

“I’m not having this argument with you, Steven. Stop fretting and get into the tub. The sooner you get washed up, the sooner you’ll be out again. Come on, no time like the present. You’re worrying too much, babe. Stop giving me that face and do as I say for once. Believe it or not, I’m only trying to help you.” Danny was getting annoyed now, Steve could tell. 

“That’s exactly the point,” Steve bit out through clenched teeth. “I’m the one doing the rescuing. I’m the one doing the _helping_. I don’t fill the role of helpless victim needing rescue very well. It’s just not who I am.” Why couldn’t Danny understand that the feeling of helplessness, of not being in control of the situation, terrified Steve more than any suicide mission ever had? 

Danny stared at him for a moment, open mouthed. “Seriously, Steven? Seriously? That’s your problem? You’re what? Feeling like your masculinity is threatened? Is that it? You don’t get to be the macho Super-SEAL for once and you’re having a crisis? Seriously? I tell you what: you asked me to be your Guide, not fifteen minutes ago. So give me the fucking chance to guide you, dammit. Now get into that tub before I drown you in it.” 

Steve thought it wiser to do as he was being told, especially since Danny’s voice held a strange kind of tone that was utterly … compelling. Danny moved with him, warm hand going from his wrist to settling into the nape of his neck. For a second Steve wanted to close his eyes in contentment. It felt so damn good. Secure. Comfortable. Like everything was right with his world. It was a bit strange, especially considering how distressed he’d felt just a moment ago. 

Water was Steve’s element and he loved it like he did few things in life, but that didn’t explain the sheer amount of pleasure he felt when he sank deeper into that tub. Steve suspected it was something Danny was doing but he just couldn’t find the energy to be upset about it. Not when he was floating in a bubble of calm and content and warmth. Maybe that whole bathing thing hadn’t been such a bad idea after all. Steve felt better than he could remember feeling in a long time – especially since a parking garage had fallen onto his and Danny’s heads. It was sort of weird he wasn’t feeling a lot worse, actually. He let his eyes fall closed, soaking up all the pleasant feelings that seemed to cocoon him.

“What are you doing, Danny?” Steve managed to ask after a while. Danny hadn’t moved an inch from his position at the side of the tub; his had still lightly curled around the nape of Steve’s neck. 

There was the hint of a smile in Danny’s voice as he said, “I’m doing what us Guides do best. I’m taking care of my Sentinel.”

* * *

Three days later found them at the local Center. The girl at the reception desk was young and pretty. From the feel of it she was a low level Guide, but her face didn’t show any kind of reaction to Steve’s status as an unbonded Sentinel. Danny felt a wave of pride at the fact that after less than twenty-four hours Steve now managed to maintain a complete shielding with only very little help on Danny’s part. Then again, Danny couldn’t remember a time when Steve hadn’t excelled at something he’d set his mind to. 

“Good morning Commander McGarrett, Detective Williams. How can I be of help to Five-0?” she asked pleasantly, and smiled at them in a generic kind of way. It didn’t really come as a surprise that she knew their names; everyone seemed to recognize them these days. It wasn’t always a good thing. 

“We’re not here in an official capacity,” Danny said, and smiled at her just as falsely. “We’re here to register Sentinel McGarrett with the Center. Could you find us a counselor, please? He’ll need a full evaluation and probably a spiritual healing session, too. He came online in response to a high level stress situation and is still under the aftereffects of it. Any personnel interacting with him need to be made aware of that, for security reasons.” At that moment Danny was immensely grateful for the fact that he had made Steve agree to let him talk. Steve would probably have withheld half of the most vital information, claiming he was fine. 

The smile on the receptionist’s face – and why was there no name tag? – suddenly looked forced and more terrified than polite. “Just one moment, gentlemen,” she said as she started to type something into her computer. She probably looked Steve up. If he’d been classified as latent rather than just a carrier, he’d have been required to come in for an annual check-up and evaluation, and she clearly knew that hadn’t been the case. Danny wondered briefly if she would look him up as well, but then decided she probably wouldn’t bother. He’d been placed on the inactive list so long ago no-one really knew about the fact that he was a Guide. 

After a moment a look of surprised panic rushed over her face, and Danny knew she’d found what she had been looking for. She picked up the phone and dialed a number, then shot Steve nervous glances as she waited for the line to connect. “Sir, I have a situation. I think you might like to look into it yourself. I’ve sent you the necessary information already. Yes. Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.”

She ended the call and Danny briefly wondered if Steve had tried to listen in on her conversation with her superior. He really hoped he hadn’t; using his senses with only the basic exercises Danny had put him through was a dangerous thing and could cause a serious setback if something went wrong. Steve gave no indication of what was going on in his head, his shielding as solid as a wall. He just stood there, looking tense and slightly impatient. 

Visibly pulling herself together, the girl smiled at them and rounded the reception desk. She walked over to a closed door to their right and swept a key card through the reader next to the handle. The lock beeped and she pulled the door open for them, holding it. “Please go on in. The second room to the right is empty. If you would please wait there, a counselor will be with you shortly.”

Danny let Steve go first since he knew that Steve’s protective instinct was probably working overtime. Predictably Steve quickly scanned the area for hidden threats, made sure he knew where the exits were and acted like he was on a mission – or Danny’s protective detail. Danny refrained from making a comment about it. It wouldn’t do to agitate him right before his talk with the counselor. 

The room that had been appointed to them was sparsely furnished and had the typical Sentinel friendly appliances in place: an air filter, a white noise generator that was giving off sound of waves, and it was bare of any color. It reminded Danny of a hospital room and he instantly hated it. But if he was being perfectly honest, this environment really was easiest on Steve’s senses. 

They hadn’t been in the room for more than a moment when two people entered: a man in his mid-fifties and a beautiful young woman. He was a Sentinel and she was a Guide, but while the man was bonded, the woman wasn’t and her interest in Steve was more than obviousAnd that was with his shields firmly pulled up. Danny didn’t want to imagine what would happen should Steve drop his shields around her. He would have bet it wouldn’t be pretty, and would probably involve a lot of drool on the woman’s part. 

“Welcome, gentlemen. This is Counselor Stella Inari, and I’m Director Alan Smyth. I lead this branch of the Center. We’ve been informed that you have come to register with the Center, Sentinel McGarrett; what a fortunate and unexpected surprise. I’m sure there is much we can learn from a case like yours. It’s rather fascinating. We’re glad you have decided to come to us. I can promise you that we will do everything in our power to help you adjust to the changes in your life.” 

He spoke directly to Steve and all but ignored Danny completely, but Danny hadn’t really expected anything else. Ever since that counselor had sealed his fate as a Guide all those years ago, Danny had turned into a _persona non grata_. It was one of the reasons he hadn’t even bothered to try for an appeal after the four year waiting period – he’d been an outcast in the Sentinel/Guide community by then anyway. Things had changed though. He’d promised Steve to be his Guide if they could convince the Center to lift his ban, and he wasn’t going to back out of his promise. 

“I’m not going to be your guinea pig.” Steve’s cold voice broke Danny out of his musings. He looked tense and pissed off already, and without giving it too much thought, Danny reached out and closed his hand around Steve’s bare forearm. Steve’s shields seemed to flicker for a second and then stabilized. Danny gently pushed a bit of his own energy at Steve, but tried not to give away the fact that he was doing it at all to the members of the Center. 

Director Smyth raised his hands in a placating manner and said, “Of course not, Sentinel McGarrett, but we could learn so much from you. This research could help other Sentinels like you, who are unaware at the moment that they could actually come online in the first place. That’s a good thing, isn’t it?” Counselor Inari shifted uneasily at Smyth’s side, as if she was uncomfortable with his whitewashing the truth – that they did indeed want to use Steve as some sort of lab rat because of the special circumstances of his coming online. 

“I think you already have your answer, Director Smyth,” Danny couldn’t resist saying, which earned him a glare from both Smyth and Inari. He chose to ignore them both. It probably wasn’t the wisest course of action, but Danny wouldn’t stand for Steve’s wishes being ignored. They might think him weak after coming online so recently, and so violently, but Steve was anything but helpless. If anything, Steve now was more dangerous than ever before. 

“And I think you should leave now, Detective Williams. We’ll take it from here. I assure you, Sentinel McGarrett is in best hands with us,” Counselor Inari spoke for the first time. She glared at Danny and it was perfectly clear that she was displeased with his closeness to Steve. Smyth cleared his throat. 

“Counselor Inari is right. We appreciate all that you have done for Sentinel McGarrett, Detective Williams, but it is time for you to leave now. Rest assured that we will do everything to make him comfortable in his new role as a Sentinel, and in a couple of weeks he will be ready to return to his duties with Five-0. Until then, I fear there is nothing more you can do. Evaluation and treatment of any trauma that occurred is a private matter between a Sentinel and the Center. Look at it as something like patient-doctor confidentiality.” Smyth really tried his very best to hide his irritation but he wasn’t very successful. 

“Danny stays or I leave with him,” Steve said in a tone of voice that made every alarm bell in Danny’s head ring. There was barely controlled anger lurking under the surface, and Steve would blow if these Center idiots said the wrong thing. “We’re each other’s medical proxy anyway so your argument is void. Besides, I want him as my Guide so we should train together, right?” And there it was – the elephant in the room. The fact that every one of them knew exactly what Danny was but no one dared to mention it. 

“You can’t be serious. Detective Williams is completely unsuited to be your Guide. You need a proper Guide who can support you to the fullest. I know you are grateful to Detective Williams and all he claims he has done for you, but there are a lot of professional, well trained Guides who would be a much better choice for you. Detective Williams is not a choice at all. Surely you’ll understand that we can’t allow you to bind yourself to him.” Counselor Inari sounded scandalized, and Danny doubted she even realized what a grave mistake she’d just made. 

A muscle in Steve’s jaw twitched and his hands balled to fists. Danny decided damage control was in order, and quickly. He stepped between Inari and Steve and glared at her. She really didn’t have a clue how close Steve was to blowing up. “What the hell?” Danny cast a quick glance between the Director and the Counselor, baffled at their lack of tact and self preservation. “Are you actively trying to undo all of the work I’ve done since he came online? Do you have any fucking idea what it took to get him stable enough to walk through that door under his own steam and not have him be brought in with an emergency team sedated to his eyeballs because he was in so much pain? Do you? Is this some kind of joke to you?” 

“And that kind of behavior is exactly the reason why you are unsuited to be Guiding anyone, let alone a Sentinel like him. You’re volatile, unfocused and unbalanced, and you feel the need to put yourself before your Sentinel. You can claim you helped him all you want; we know it’s not true. I will find him a proper Guide to bond with and there is no way I will allow him to be tainted with the likes of you.” Director Smyth decided to enter the conversation, his voice dripping with disdain. “Sentinel McGarrtet is special, an unprecedented case. You’ll never be able to provide what he needs. I don’t care what you think you did to stabilize Sentinel McGarrett; he’s here now and in this Center, my rules apply.”

Steve growled. 

Danny quickly turned around so he faced Steve and grabbed both of his bare forearms in his hands. He pushed at the furious anger that was boiling right under the surface in an attempt to help Steve stay in control. “Don’t, babe,” Danny said. He threw all caution to the wind and merged his own shields with Steve’s. Behind him, Counselor Inari made a startled sound. Danny ignored her in favor of concentrating on Steve. “Sentinel, focus.” Danny ordered, just like he had three days before when he had brought Steve back from his near catatonic state. 

Steve closed his eyes briefly and took a few shuddering breaths. “Guide,” he breathed, and ducked his head to lean his forehead against Danny’s in a gesture of trust. His shields solidified again and the murderous rage that had been so close to the surface receded into the back of Steve’s mind, contained for the moment. 

Danny wished for a real bond so damn much. It wouldn’t have come to this at all if he had been bonded to Steve properly. But before they could bond officially Steve needed to register his new status and he needed to be evaluated. Despite the fact that they had known each other for years now, Danny could still use all the help he could get in figuring out how to best handle Steve and his enhanced senses. The more both of them knew about Steve’s strengths and weaknesses, the better prepared they would be. Danny just didn’t get how they had managed to get a shitty, self-absorbed Center employee again. 

Steve straightened and stepped around Danny to speak to Smyth directly. “Did you just say that you will not allow me to bond with a Guide of my own choosing? Is that really what you’re saying?” he asked in a cold, controlled voice. When Inari tried to say something Steve silenced her with the raise of his hand. “Did you honestly just try to deny a Sentinel in your care the right to choose his own Guide?” Everyone who knew Steve would have recognized the fact that things were about to get really, really nasty. 

“I was merely pointing out that Detective Williams might not be the best choice as a Guide for you,” Smyth said, and he sounded a lot less self-assured than he had just a few moments ago. “He has been put on the inactive list for a reason, and it is in everyone’s best interest that I point out that fact. It would be a grave negligence on my part if I did not notify you of the fact that you are considering to bond with a Guide that is considered a security hazard.”

There was a faint rustling sound and a second later Steve’s spirit animal appeared next to Danny’s legs, baring its teeth. Danny reached for it and ran his hands through the soft fur at the top of the tiger’s head. The moment Danny touched it, it became visible to Smyth and Inari, and they both startled quite badly. 

Steve half turned and smirked, but his eyes were hard and cold as he addressed Smyth again. “Looks like you managed to piss off my Guide, my spirit animal _and_ me. That’s quite a feat. I’d like to shoot you. Or maybe, maybe I’ll blow you up. Danny, do we still have any grenades left in the car?” Steve asked. 

Danny smiled. “We do, but you know I can’t let you do that, babe. No blowing up the director of the Center no matter how much he deserves it. You could always act like a responsible adult and report him to the SGIS and SAGA; make sure he never gets to work with another Sentinel or Guide in his life. He’ll be ruined. How does that sound?”

“You sure I can’t blow him up?” Steve asked again and his brows knit together in a little frown. 

“Positive,” Danny replied, and the look on Director Smyth’s face was absolutely priceless. He looked much like a fish out of water, with his jaw working soundlessly. He was obviously rather shocked by the turn their conversation had taken. 

“He wouldn’t really try to blow anyone up, would he?” Counselor Inari asked Danny in a small voice. She appeared to be even more terrified than the director, and Steve hadn’t even threatened her at all. Something about the woman seemed to hold Steve back. Maybe it was her status as an unbonded Guide that resonated with him. Sentinels were protective of Guides by nature which was probably why the Center employed Guides as counselors and not Sentinels. There was no territorial behavior to take into consideration. 

“Steve blows things up all the time. People less often, though. I don’t think you have anything to worry about. He’s not gonna kill you just because you wanted him all to yourself. Director Smyth’s motives are a lot less excusable though. He’s not reacting to Steve on an emotional level, like you do. He wanted him for his own gain. To poke and prod him, to run tests and figure out what happened that made him come online despite everyone thinking it would be impossible. To be able to do all that he would have needed Steve to bond with a Guide of his choice. A Guide he could control and who in turn would gain some sort of control over Steve. It’s disgusting.” Danny didn’t care that his anger and contempt were clearly audible in his voice. Steve’s spirit animal head-butted him gently as if in support.

“That’s outrageous. I will not stand for this. You’re delusional, both of you. I’m invoking the security protocol regarding an out of control Sentinel. Inari, get a containment team in here. I want Sentinel McGarrett tranqed and brought into observation room three. He’s obviously a threat to himself and others and needs to be locked up. And have security escort Detective Williams out. He is assuming a position above his stand. He is a blacklisted, non-active Guide, trying to force a bond with an emotionally unstable Sentinel.” Smyth was flushed and sweaty, and Steve probably could smell the fear on him. He was panicked and trying for damage control, Danny knew that. He also knew that he had ticked off Steve again and this time there was no telling what would happen. 

Before Danny could react, Steve was across the room and had Smyth pinned to the wall by his throat. Clearly the director had been under the delusion that since he was a Sentinel himself, and bonded, he would be able to stand his ground against Steve. That Steve was also a Navy SEAL with countless black ops missions under his belt seemed to have slipped his mind. And while Steve hunted down drug lords and fought in wars, Smyth had sat behind his desk and gotten chubby. Danny watched as the director’s face turned an interesting shade of red from lack of oxygen. 

“If you so much as breathe wrong in the direction of my Guide I will drop you dead,” Steve hissed at Smyth through clenched teeth. “I don’t care what you’re throwing at me, I can take you, but you come near my Guide and you’ll regret it.” Steve was barely holding on through the rage that was coursing through his veins, Danny cold tell even from all across the room. He was close to going completely feral from what he viewed as bond-interference. For all intents and purposes, Steve was completely in the right. Inari seemed to know that as well, since she just stared at them, but didn’t even try to interfere or call that containment team Smyth had mentioned. All Danny got from her was astonishment and a bit of awe. 

Letting Steve kill Smyth would probably solve some of their problems, but Danny still couldn’t allow it. He walked over to where Steve was slowly squeezing the life out of Smyth and slipped a hand over Steve’s neck, rubbing the skin gently with his thumb. “Let go, babe. He knows you’re serious, now let him go. We’ll report him and we’ll make sure he can’t make anyone else miserable. But you shouldn’t kill him. Come on. I have no idea what it will do to your senses if you kill him with your bare hands. It could come back to bite you in the ass.”

Steve just growled. 

Smyth was starting to lose consciousness and Danny realized that he was running out of time. He changed tactics. “I said let him go, Sentinel,” Danny ordered and he put authority and bit of a Guide push behind it. It was risky while they were still unbonded but Danny really didn’t want Steve to kill Smyth. Steve abruptly released Smyth who sank to the ground, barely conscious but at least still alive. 

Danny released the breath he hadn’t been aware he was holding and rubbed his face. Great, another problem to deal with. Steve still stood in front of Smyth, glaring down at him, but Danny could feel his main shield starting to flicker. His emotions were getting the better of him and soon enough his shield would fail and then they’d be in really deep shit. “Steven, sit down before you fall down,” Danny ordered, fed up with all the drama. 

“He threatened you. I’m not giving him the chance to hurt you,” Steve said and didn’t move an inch. 

“He’s not getting up any time soon, Steve, so leave it be. I swear I will let them drug you if you’re going down from sensory overload because your main shield failed. Now sit. Relax and work on your shields. You’re an emotional mess. Smyth wasn’t going to get away with this shit away. Counselor Inari wouldn’t have executed those orders. She’s on our side.” Danny said it matter of fact because he had felt her anger and disgust at Smyth’s actions as clearly as he could now feel Steve’s unease. 

Steve shot her a distrustful look but finally sat down on the nearest chair. Inari sat as well, folding her hands in her lap. Danny ignored her in favor of wrapping his right hand around Steve’s left forearm and pushing psionic energy at him, to strengthen his primary shield. 

“I am indeed on your side, Alpha. I’m going to add my statement to yours once you report Director Smyth to the appropriate authorities.” 

Danny whirled around and looked at her in surprise. “What did you just call him?”

Counselor Inari smirked at him, he voice gentle and without even a hint of ridicule as she said, “I was addressing you, Alpha Guide Williams. I apologize for my earlier behavior; I was neglectful and put too much weight on the report in your file. Clearly, the Counselor who evaluated you back then made an error in judgment. It’s true, you have a colorful vocabulary and a temper to match, but that doesn’t necessarily disqualify you from being a Guide, as I have just seen multiple times. In fact, I think you are possibly one of the most talented Guides I’ve come across in my career so far. You’d have to be, to rein in an Alpha like Sentinel McGarrett. You’re well matched.” Her smile turned smug.

Danny was sure he was sporting a rather dumb expression. “You think we’re an Alpha pair?” Danny asked, stunned beyond belief by her assessment. 

“Isn’t that what I just said?” Inari asked with raised eyebrows and that smug little smile curling her lips. She didn’t even bother hiding her amusement about Danny’s surprise and confusion. 

“Oh come on, really? That’s the best you got? I ask you a question and I get bitchface? Seriously?” Danny’s patience was running out. “What is this? Preschool? Not fifteen minutes ago you were trying your best to keep me away from Steve and now you’re calling me Alpha?” This whole thing was getting more and more surreal by the minute. 

“That’s right,” Inari said and inclined her head, her expression politely neutral now. “Because fifteen minutes ago I didn’t think you could handle him, let alone deserve him. He’s a powerful Sentinel and I don’t have to tell you that his _presence_ is as stupidly pretty as he is attractive.”

“Sitting right here,” Steve said and he sounded tired. “I’m not some sort of trophy or a piece of meat you can fight over. It’s my choice and I won’t accept anyone but Danny as my Guide. I know the laws and I’ve made my decision.” There was steel in his voice now, as if he was bracing for an argument. An argument that wouldn’t come, Danny was certain of that. 

“Yes, your decision is quite clear,” Counselor Inari said softly. “Your spirit animal would never have tolerated anyone’s touch but that of your true Guide and your own. After I saw that, it was rather obvious that Guide Williams hadn’t influenced you in a weakened state, but the Sentinel in you had recognized him as your Guide instead. To go against your Sentinel instincts would mean breaking every rule this institution stands for.”

Smyth chose that moment to try and push himself upright, an angry scowl on his face. He didn’t seem to be able to speak since Steve had almost crushed his windpipe, but Danny wasn’t interested in what the man had to say anyway. He walked over to Smyth and punched him in the face, sending him sprawling against the wall again, unconscious. 

“Counselor, we should talk about that evaluation now. And then we’d like to schedule a bonding.”

* * *

“You ready to do this?” Danny asked as he straightened Steve’s collar and tie. Steve was wearing his dress blues and he looked ridiculously handsome. Arousal stirred in the pit of Danny’s stomach and he stomped it down viciously before Steve could recognize it for what it was. Having a Sentinel tuned in on him was going to be a serious problem if he wanted to keep his unwanted feelings to himself. Even without much training so far, Steve would be able to catch on eventually. Just thinking about the embarrassment and humiliation that moment would bring was enough to eradicate the last traces of excitement Danny felt at having Steve so close, the warmth of his body seeping through the fabric of his shirt.

“As ready as I’ll ever be.” Steve’s voice was void of any kind of emotion. He stared straight ahead, and the dark shadows under his eyes and the tenseness of his shoulders just added to the overall feeling of exhaustion Steve seemed to radiate. His shields were solid and unwavering, had been since Smyth had been removed from Steve’s presence and locked up until his trial. It didn’t make Danny feel any better. 

“You look like shit, babe. You sure you’re alright? We can push this back a couple of days until you’re more rested,” Danny said, and reluctantly stepped back from Steve. They were about to officially bond in a platonic ceremony, directly followed by the standard imprinting process. It was all very formal, stiff and boring and not what Danny had imagined his bonding would be like a couple decades ago, back when he had still been allowed to dream about perfect matches and a sexual bond with a Sentinel he would love with all his heart. 

He did love Steve that way, no question, but Steve didn’t share his feelings and naturally Danny didn’t expect him to. Sentinels and Guides often didn’t have set sexual preferences, but Steve had been career military and as far as Danny was aware had never even looked at a man that way – why would he, when women like Catherine were falling at his feet? Danny would have bet that Steve could have any woman he wanted, on any terms. There was just something intensely mesmerizing about him. 

“I’m fine, Danny, just tired. Stop fussing. It’s just that everything the Center had me do was exhausting, even the mediations. Stella – Counselor Inari – wore me out with all those tests and the soul healing. And not in a fun way, you know. Just let’s get this over with, all right?” Steve clenched his jaw and a frown line appeared between his eyes that Danny would have liked to rub away. He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his suit instead and nodded. 

“All right, let’s get this show on the road.”

* * *

Steve hated to admit it even to himself, but he was disappointed. This wasn’t how he had imagined his bonding would feel. Somehow he’d thought having Danny in his mind, _anchored_ to him, would have felt different. More intimate. Less … something. There was a part of him in the deepest, darkest corner of his soul that still ached with longing. It felt raw and sore, like a deep bruise that chafed with every breath he took, and turned every fleeting brush of Danny’s mind into a reminder of what he didn’t have. 

So this was the much praised “mental embrace” of his Guide? The union of two halves into a whole the master of ceremonies had talked about? This was it? That empty, achy feeling of ‘almost but not quite’ was supposed to be his safe haven? It was almost ridiculous how betrayed and cheated he felt. 

“You may now imprint on your Guide,” the master of ceremonies, an elderly Guide with a round face and kind eyes, said. 

As Steve watched, he handed Danny a goblet with water. Danny took it and drank from it, his lips and saliva leaving a clearly visible mark on the otherwise perfectly polished, gleaming metal. Danny turned and handed the goblet to Steve and their eyes met for a moment. It was a strange feeling. There was a fleeting brush of mental fingers from Danny, but it didn’t feel intrusive or probing, rather gentle and slightly curious. 

Steve took a deep breath and looked at the goblet he held, mentally preparing for what he was about to do. Intellectually he knew that this was a safe and proven method of getting the ‘taste’ part of the imprint out of the way. The surface of the goblet had been sealed to ensure that nothing but the Guide’s sample would be transferred – Steve would have rather kissed Danny instead. But since that wasn’t an option, he carefully dialed up his sense of taste and closed his mouth right over the place Danny had drunk from. 

Danny’s taste exploded through Steve, a heady mixture of flavors that mingled into something uniquely Danny. Somehow it was exactly what Steve had anticipated and still so much more. It was intoxicating and Steve knew immediately that he had made a grave error in judgment; one taste of Danny, no matter how fleeting, would never be enough for him. 

Reluctantly Steve handed the goblet back to the master of ceremonies, well aware of the fact that the upcoming imprints weren’t going be any easier. Scent would be at least as hard, sound might be bearable, but touch would be a real challenge. Touching Danny when he hadn’t already been a Sentinel had sent spikes of excitement and arousal through Steve at times, and he’d felt guilty for it. Now it was even harder, knowing what the closeness of Danny as his Guide could do to him. To his senses. But he needed to be able to ground himself on Danny, to catalogue him in order to never lose track of him. 

Beside him, Danny took off his jacket with precise, careful movements and placed the garment on a nearby chair. He stepped closer to Steve, facing him, his whole posture calm. Steve didn’t get anything at all from their shiny new bond; it was as if the adrenalin rushing through his system drowned out any emotion but the weird mix of excitement and apprehension. How was he supposed to touch Danny, to learn his scent, and still keep the love he felt for Danny hidden from him? Steve had fought so hard to keep it all bottled up – emotions could be used against you, that was something he’d learned early on. It was wiser to keep them hidden, better yet to not feel them in the first place. He’d failed on the ‘not feeling’ part already, so he really should do better on the ‘keeping hidden’ one. 

“Place your right hand on your Guide’s chest and feel his heartbeat. Then identify his heartbeat by sound and let all other sounds drift into the background. Once you have made yourself familiar with your Guide’s heartbeat you may take away your hand and step back.” The master of ceremonies sounded more excited than Steve himself felt. 

Steve knew delaying the inevitable would gain nothing but Danny’s suspicions, so he stepped a little closer and slowly placed his right hand on the middle of Danny’s chest. Warmth seeped through Danny’s crisp, white shirt and Steve could feel Danny’s heartbeat under his fingers. It was faster than expected, since Danny looked so outwardly calm. 

Steve tilted his head lightly and listened to the heartbeats in the room, dismissing one after the other until he’d found the one matching the rhythm he felt under his fingertips. This was it. Danny’s heart. Everything else faded into the background as Steve made himself familiar with the unique sound of Danny’s heartbeat. It was strong and steady and oddly reassuring. Steve knew now that he’d memorized every little detail about it, he would forever be able to tell it apart from others. Somehow that thought was very calming. 

After a time he figured was the maximum he could get away with, Steve dropped his hand and took a step back from Danny. He dialed down his hearing again, disengaging himself from his connection with Danny and he instantly missed both the warmth of his body and the sound of his heart. How had he survived without this before? How would he ever be able to function without wanting to tune his whole self into Danny, wrap all of his senses up in him and stay forever?

“Alpha Guide Williams, please roll up the sleeves of your shirt now, so your Sentinel may learn you by the feel and scent of your skin,” the master of ceremonies said, and to Steve’s ears it sounded way too gleeful. This was supposed to be a platonic ceremony. Having sex would have been faster, easier and more thorough but he wouldn’t do that to Danny. He couldn’t ask that of his best friend and partner; Steve wasn’t sure their friendship would survive it. 

Something about his thoughts must have shown on his face or been transmitted over the bond because Danny looked up at him sharply from where he was rolling up his left sleeve. “You’re doing great, babe. Relax. It’s almost over.”

Steve didn’t say anything; he just gave a sharp nod and watched as Danny swiftly and efficiently finished with his sleeves, revealing strong forearms with a dusting of soft blond hair. Steve had seen Danny’s bare arms hundreds of times, had even seen him shirtless, but this, here, was something completely different. It was intimate in a way Steve had no words for. 

When he was done Danny once more stood in front of Steve, even closer than before. He turned his hands palms up and offered them for Steve to take in his. Instead of putting his own palms into Danny’s though, Steve placed his own underneath Danny’s and then slowly ran his hands up the underside of his forearms. Steve gently curled his fingers around Danny’s arms feeling the soft texture under his fingertips. He concentrated on the way Danny’s skin felt, the warmth, the fine hairs tickling Steve’s palm, the blood he could feel rushing underneath the surface. 

Danny made a contented sound in the back of his throat and Steve looked at him, curiously. 

“Scent, Steven,” Danny said instead of giving an answer to Steve’s unspoken question. 

Steve felt disappointed. 

Obediently he changed his grip on Danny’s left arm and lifted it up until it rested on the collar of his dress blues; Danny’s elbow right next to Steve’s face. Steve turned his head slightly to press his nose against the soft skin of Danny’s forearm. It was an awkward position, but better than sniffing at Danny’s neck in any case, which would have been the alternative to doing the scent imprint at the crook of Danny’s elbow. Danny’s skin smelled spicy and clean, familiar in a way Steve hadn’t been aware of.

Danny smelled like home. 

Before he could catch himself, Steve had changed his grip on Danny again and licked at the patch of skin closest to his lips; just a quick little swipe to see if it tasted as good as it had smelled. It did and Steve’s stomach did an uncomfortable little flip. 

Danny made a startled sound but didn’t take his arm away. He just stared at Steve with an unreadable expression. 

The master of ceremonies on the other hand outright laughed. “That happens all the time,” he said, as he looked at the two of them with a fatherly expression. “Scent and taste are closely linked and many Sentinels can’t resist the urge to taste what they have just scented. It’s completely normal and nothing to worry about.”

Steve felt his face heat up in embarrassment. That shouldn’t have happened. He should have had himself under better control. But Danny was so damn tempting. He cleared his throat and carefully lifted Danny’s arm away from himself, careful not to meet Danny’s eyes. 

“Now comes the last and most important part. Alpha Sentinel McGarrett, look at your Guide closely and then bring up all of your senses. Combine the individual sensory imprints you have made of your Guide to a complete whole. Recognize your Guide in his entirety so he can become your anchor, and the center and focus to your senses. Complete your imprint on him and entrust yourself to his Guidance. He will not lead you astray.” 

Steve knew that at least part of that little speech involved old, ritualistic words, but they still made him uncomfortable. Could Danny feel his reluctance to put all of his feelings into their bond? Did the raw, sore feeling inside of his mind, inside of his chest, stem from his unwillingness to open up to Danny completely? Would it make any difference if he told Danny he had fallen in love with him? 

“Focus, Steven. You can do this. Come on. I know you can use me as a focal point. We trained for this even before we had a bond. Don’t let the fancy words fool you into thinking this is any different than what you’ve done these past few days. It’ll just be a lot easier from now on.” Danny’s voice was soft but intense, as if he had sensed Steve’s reluctance and decided to step in. Which in all likelihood was exactly what had happened. 

A sense of calmness and reassurance traveled along the bond and Steve soaked up the comfort Danny was providing. His shields thrummed with energy when Danny pushed at them gently and Steve suppressed a shudder. This was intimate in a way he’d never experienced before. Maybe this bond thing wasn’t all bad. It didn’t take away the sore feeling inside his mind, but it allowed him to get a sense of Danny he hadn’t had before. 

Steve took a deep breath and took both of Danny’s hands in his. Fixing his gaze onto Danny’s impossibly blue eyes, Steve brought up his senses slowly, one by one until his whole being was filled with nothing but _Danny_. The sound of his Guide’s heartbeat, the feel of his skin, the scent that was uniquely Danny. He’d never get enough of that. This was the person he had committed his life to, and nothing would change that. 

If only that raw spot inside of him would go away. The frustration Steve felt at the realization that there was a small portion of himself Danny couldn’t reach almost made him sob with disappointment. He wanted it all. So badly. Why couldn’t he make it work?

“Come back now, babe,” Danny’s voice, even though it was calm and steady held a hint of an order. 

Steve blinked a couple of times, trying to clear his head. He hadn’t exactly zoned on Danny, but he hadn’t been completely in the present, either. He brought his senses down to a normal level and let go of Danny’s hands. They were done. 

“Congratulations on completing your bonding and imprint, Alphas! May your journey together be a long and happy one!” The master of ceremonies beamed at them. Thankfully he knew better than to touch either of them. Steve wasn’t sure if he could have dealt with it in that moment. There was a possessive streak rearing its head inside of him and Steve wasn’t completely sure he should feel it that strongly. He needed to do more research.

* * *

Danny looked down at the silver bracelet that circled his left wrist. It was fitted in a way that would ensure that it didn’t present any risk to him in the field. Steve was wearing a similar one – it was part of their being recognized as a bonded pair. In fact, the new Center director had gone ahead and had registered them as the official Alpha pair for the area.

It was a strange thought still. Some days Danny couldn’t comprehend the changes that had happened in his life. He was a bonded, active Guide. He was being recognized as part of an Alpha pair, even, which was something Danny hadn’t expected in his wildest dreams. 

He was living with Steve – even though Danny had to admit that the house afforded both of them more than enough room to avoid each other. He had a bedroom of his own and all of his things had been integrated into Steve’s household somehow. Grace had a room, too and she would be staying over a lot more often, once the bond had settled and they had gotten used to living together. At least that was what Danny told himself. 

Part of him hated being apart from Steve at night. He didn’t exactly know why, it wasn’t anything sexual – or well at least not primarily – it was something about not being able to connect to Steve as well as he could throughout the day. And Danny had a feeling that his Sentinel could use all the grounding he could get, some nights. 

Training had begun in earnest for them and Steve absolutely _hated_ the sensory tests the people at the Center put him through. Scent was worst. Steve struggled to distinguish the scent markers for fear, pain or stress, which was especially difficult when they mingled and overlapped. He complained about headaches and dizziness, and some days they had to cut training short so Steve could rest. It usually took Danny to step in and make him take a break, though, because his stubborn as a mule Sentinel apparently didn’t know when to take it easy on himself. 

Drugs, explosives and other harmful chemicals seemed to be easier for Steve to identify and he joked that they didn’t need any detection dogs any more – he could do their job just as well. Danny hadn’t commented on that, thinking it would be better not to rile up Steve even more. 

With a sigh, Danny picked up the duffle bag that he’d brought with him from the Center. It contained their new equipment. Their tac vests now sported a symbol that identified them as a Sentinel/Guide team, and their new work clothes were made of a different, organic fiber and were devoid of the chemicals the gear was usually treated with. 

It reminded Danny of the house-cleaning they’d had to do at Steve’s house first thing after he came online. New detergent, new sheets, new mattress for the bed, and a special cleaning crew had turned Steve’s house inside out in an attempt to get rid of anything that would have a negative effect on him. Steve had almost broken out in hives at the invasion of his privacy though. 

He didn’t take the transition to being a full-fledged Sentinel well at all. It worried Danny a bit, but there wasn’t much he could do about that fact, other than trying to make it as easy as possible on Steve. Kono and Chin had sent over a gift box containing Sentinel friendly shower products – along with a note saying they hoped he would stop taking three minute showers now. And, of course, that they missed him. 

Danny was sure Steve missed them at least as much.

Until the bond had settled and Steve’s territorial instincts didn’t run as high – he’d started growling at everyone who came near Danny right after their bonding/imprint ceremony – they wouldn’t have any guests. The only people they dealt with were at the Center, and then only bonded Guides were allowed near Steve, since he felt protective rather than hostile towards Guides. It had put a bit of a hitch into their training schedule, but they all agreed that better safe than sorry was the way to go. 

It would still take some time until they’d adjusted, and the more physically challenging part of their training would begin soon, so Danny was slightly weary. What if he failed Steve? What if they couldn’t do what they were supposed to be able to do? What if their bond wasn’t enough, their connection somehow not strong enough, for whatever reasons? What if Steve got hurt because Danny was a lousy Guide who only pretended to know what he was doing? 

Danny felt a headache coming on. He needed to go to Steve and see how he was doing. Something was off, but Danny couldn’t quite put a finger on it. Maybe letting Steve try out their new gear would help a bit. Danny sighed again. Sometimes he wished that his life came with a user’s manual. 

Walking around the house, Danny finally found Steve standing in the open door to the backyard, looking at the beach and the waves. He stood perfectly still, and something about his posture set a whole bunch of alarm bells off in Danny’s head. He recognized a zone when he saw one, and even though he couldn’t actually look at Steve’s face yet, Danny was sure his Sentinel was in trouble. 

Cursing under his breath Danny rounded Steve and sure enough, Steve was staring sightlessly into the distance. Danny turned slightly and followed his line of sight. There was something glittery and reflective flashing intermittently in the distance,and Danny was reasonably sure that was what had Steve enthralled. 

Danny rubbed his forehead and sighed. This was so typical for Steve. He knew he wasn’t supposed to use his senses without Danny being present, especially since they hadn’t even figured out the whole working as a bonded pair gig yet. It didn’t really come as a surprise that Steve had zoned on something using his senses while Danny was half across the house. 

Taking a deep breath, Danny reached for Steve’s hands and took them in his. He squeezed lightly and stepped closer to Steve, way into his personal space. “Alright, babe, vacation time is over. You need to come back to me, now. Yes, I know, I know that sparkly, glittery thing you’re staring at is really fascinating, but zoning is against the rules, remember? And you know how by-the-book I am. I don’t want our butts kicked at the Center for you getting stuck in a zone. Now, would you do me a favor and quit staring quite so hard and focus on me?” Danny kept his tone light and teasing, not unlike one of his more playful rants. But when Steve didn’t react, he changed tactics. 

“Sentinel, I said _focus on me_ ,” Danny ordered, using his Guide gifts to get the command across. He put a considerable mental push behind it, too and watched Steve closely. 

Steve blinked and a shudder ran through him. “Danny? What the hell?” He looked confused and disoriented and a little angry. 

“You zoned, Steven,” Danny said in his best ‘I’m less than happy with your performance’ tone of voice. He let go of Steve’s hands and took a step back, instantly feeling bereft. This close to his Sentinel Danny always felt more content, more at peace than when there was more distance between them. Danny wasn’t sure if it was a _Guide_ thing or a result of his unwanted sexual attraction to his very male, very straight partner. 

“What? But I … I didn’t even _mean_ to use my senses. There was just …” he trailed off and gestured into the direction of the sparkling, glittering thing that had held him captive.

Danny watched as Steve’s jaw worked silently, his feelings clearly visible on his face, and a wave of red hot anger flooded the bond, making Danny flinch and pull up his shields in the attempt to protect himself. While he was at it, he redoubled the barrier around his innermost feelings – his love for Steve – making sure nothing would be able to pierce his ironclad defenses. 

Danny put his hands onto his hips, suddenly irrationally irritated with Steve. “I know you didn’t mean to. You _never_ mean to get in trouble; to get shot at, to get blown up, to get tortured and almost killed. But you know what, you manage anyway. What if that glittery … something hadn’t caught your attention while you were standing here on your back porch? What then, hm? What if next time something catches your interest you are in the middle of a road when you freeze up? Or behind the wheel? Huh? What then, Steven? Do you expect me to stand by and watch you get run over by a car? Or constantly worry if the next broken motel sign will send you into a zone? Is that what you want, Steven? Why can’t you do as you’re being told _once_ and be careful? How am I supposed to Guide you when you don’t even give me a chance to do my fucking job?” 

Steve’s shoulders slumped and he looked away, but not before Danny had seen the anger and something akin to pain in his eyes. In that moment Danny wanted nothing more than to drop his shields and reach out for him, connect them in the most intimate of ways until their minds were one and could never be separated again. But he wouldn’t. He couldn’t, really. Steve could never know of the things Danny hid from him, and letting go of his shields completely was now more dangerous than ever. 

Still, Danny ached at the sadness he could easily read in the tense line of Steve’s shoulders, the guilt that was radiating off of him in almost tangible waves now. Looked like Danny had hit him harder than he’d anticipated.

Shit. 

He’d wanted for Steve to be more careful, not make him miserable. Danny sighed and reached a hand out to Steve, but Steve took a step back. “I’m sorry, babe. I didn’t mean to-”

“No. No you’re right Danny. I was careless. I didn’t think anything could happen when I decided to take a look at that reflection back there. I shouldn’t have used my senses without you being near to intervene. I’m sorry I’m making this whole thing harder on you than it has to be. You’re only trying to do your job and I keep screwing up. I’ll try to do better, promise.”

He sounded toneless and _off_ , but Danny couldn’t get a read on him anymore; Steve had somehow managed to pull up and solidify all of his own shields, the bond dull and useless between them. Danny felt like the world’s biggest asshole. 

“I think I’ll go to bed now. Zoning takes it out of me. Night, Danny.” Steve turned and walked back into the house at a brisk pace, never once looking back.

“Dammit!” Danny cursed and resisted the urge to kick something. How the hell did he always manage to screw up so spectacularly when it came to Steve?

* * *

Steve tried to control his breathing even though his head felt ready to explode any moment now. At least he didn’t feel like puking his guts out this time. Then again they hadn’t tried to piggyback his sight onto his hearing today, which had been the cause of his humiliating display the other day. The attempt to combine his senses to make them work in a specific way hadn’t worked at all, instead it had given him vertigo and such a bad headache that he’d thrown up right in the middle of the pristine training room. God, he felt like such a rookie.

“Hey, Steve, you okay babe? Need a break?” Danny’s hand landed on Steve’s arm, warm and solid and reassuring and the stress headache instantly abated a bit. Steve wished he could have Danny touching him permanently, wanted to crawl under his skin and stay there and never come out again. He felt like wrapping himself up into Danny’s presence and taking comfort from him, and strength. But he couldn’t. It just didn’t work that way. 

Steve knew that by now he should be able to rely on Danny completely. To just immerse himself into the bond with his Guide and let him be the one to tether and ground him, to anchor him. But Steve couldn’t. The raw, chafing feeling inside of him didn’t go away no matter how much Danny and he tried to make amends, tried to make it work. They’d made a truce over breakfast a couple of days ago, a vow to make it work, to be honest with each other, but apparently it wasn’t enough. 

“No, I’m fine, Danny, I just want to get it over with,” Steve said and clenched his jaw tightly. He wanted this day to be over and done with. He’d like to actually be able to get something right. He’d like to not feel like such a failure anymore. Up till now, if he’d really applied himself, put his all into something, it had worked out. He’d been sore, tired, hurt, cold or scorching hot, he’d been exhausted and dehydrated, beaten bloody and half starved, but he’d succeeded in the end. But this? This wasn’t working out at all no matter what they tried. 

Danny sighed. “Alright, tell me what you need. Tell me what to do differently so you’ll be able to finish this obstacle course. You gotta give me something to work with here, babe, or I won’t be able to help you.” He sounded frustrated and tired to Steve’s ears. Weary. 

“I don’t know, Danny!” Steve snapped. “If I knew we wouldn’t still be here, would we? I’d have figured it out and made it work, but I can’t. I’m trying, alright? I’m trying. But it's just not as easy as everyone makes it sound.” Steve hated the frustrated tone in his own voice but he couldn't help it. If he knew what he needed to make this work, he’d say so. Danny had to know that. Everything felt _off_. And that sore, chafing spot inside his chest, inside his _mind_ that flared up anew when Danny took his hand away wasn't helping any. It was driving Steve insane. So yeah, he should have himself under better control, being a SEAL and all that. But seriously? His life sucked. 

Steve watched as Danny scrubbed his hands over his face. “Look, maybe you're trying too hard. We shouldn't assume you'll be good at this just because you're a SEAL, right?” He sounded reasonable now. Analytical. Steve hated it. 

There was a feeling transmitting over their bond, something nasty and cold and insecure. Steve couldn't identify it, but it made his skin itch. He hated that feeling even more. Danny wasn’t happy, that much was obvious. 

Steve sighed. He knew he needed to give Danny _something_ to work with. Danny couldn’t help him if he didn’t know what Steve’s problem was, and the magical working of the bond was obviously …not working at all. Which sucked even more because right about now Steve would give anything to have Danny be able to sense what he was struggling with. 

“It’s called ‘training’ for a reason, Danny,” Steve said after a moment of tense silence. “No one is good at it at first - I just have to tough it out. It’s not the first drill I’m failing on the first try. I just can’t ... I just can’t get it right. That strobe light over there feels like it’s piercing my brain right through my left eye. I’m pretty sure that’s not how it’s supposed to go.” The strobe light really was a problem. 

“And ... whatever it is you are freaked out about - stop it. It feels like a cold hand gripping my spine. It’s distracting as hell. It’s not your fault I’m failing to finish a simple obstacle course.”

Steve was getting angry and he had no idea why, exactly. It wasn’t as if they had any experience with any of this. He should probably cut both of them some slack. It wouldn’t miraculously solve all of his problems, but it might at least ease some of the tension Steve could see in Danny’s shoulders. 

Danny nodded sharply. “Fine. Right. We can do this.” 

He surveyed the training course as if to figure out the best way to proceed.

“Forget about the strobe light. In fact, just close your eyes. You don’t need to see to complete this section, and if the light is affecting you that bad, you need to block it out.” Danny said. 

Steve stared at Danny incredulously. He was supposed to close his eyes? He couldn’t very well walk around completely blind. He’d run into something, or stumble or ... Unless ... If his other senses worked the way they should and if Danny ... 

He trusted Danny. He trusted Danny with his life. If Danny said he didn’t need his eyes, then he didn’t. Danny had worked something out and Steve had to just trust him and go for it. 

On the other hand, this was all so new. What if he zoned on one of the other senses? What if he got caught in a deep zone and their bond wasn’t enough, wasn’t strong enough, or deep enough or something? Steve suspected that the sore, chafing feeling in his mind came from some failure on his part to let Danny in. If he didn’t give Danny the chance to anchor himself into his mind completely, how would they ever succeed? How could they ever have the kind of bond that they would need to make things work out in the field? 

Steve swallowed hard and forced his insecurities and fear back down into that compartment of his mind where all his insecurities went right before a mission. Locked away to be dealt with later - or preferably never. 

“You sure about that, Danno?” he asked and closed his eyes, purposefully dismissing the bright, piercing light that had bothered him. 

Steve thought that there was a slight moment of hesitation before Danny spoke, but it could also have been in his imagination only, so he dismissed it. 

“Yes, I’m sure. If sight bothers you, we’re just gonna take that out of the equation. Now, I want you to feel the air currents on your skin; feel how they move around you. They move around the obstacles the same way, around and over. Follow the air currents.”

Oh! Of course! Steve felt like an idiot for not having thought about that. It was just like in water. Or when jumping out of a plane ... Of course Danny had known what to do. He really needed to work on trusting Danny to do that Guide thing. 

Acting on impulse Steve pulled off his t-shirt to be able to feel the air on his skin a bit better. Until he had better control over his senses … dials or whatever they wanted him to imagine, he’d need every advantage he could get. He dropped the shirt to the floor and dialed up his sense of touch while simultaneously sinking deeper into the bond he shared with Danny. There was a burning sensation for a fraction of a second, as if something in the bond adjusted, but Steve didn't know what to make of it, so he dismissed it as unimportant. 

There was a faint, clicking sound somewhere to his right and Steve instinctively tilted his head into that direction, bringing up his hearing along with it. Something uneasy and _wrong_ prickled over the base of his neck but he couldn’t identify what was happening to him. He had no reference points. 

“Danny?” Steve asked, suddenly worried. He didn’t open his eyes, but the bond between Danny and him suddenly seemed to go tense with alarm. 

Then something in the air around him changed, there was a faint whooshing noise accompanied by a split-second of something like terror being transmitted through the bond before there was noise and light and pressure and then Steve’s world drowned in pain. 

Everything hurt. His ears rang with the force of the sound explosion; his skin felt like someone had mowed him down with a truck, his eyes blinded by the bright light even though his eyes had been closed. The two senses that had been open wide were completely out of control, the dials blown away by agony and nausea and disorientation. 

He staggered and dropped to his knees, trying to get away from the pain, the chaos he’d been thrown into. Blind and deaf and in so much pain, Steve longed for the small reprieve unconsciousness would provide. But something tethered him to the present, unwilling to let him slip into oblivion. 

There was something touching his chest, something soothing and warm. Something that miraculously didn’t hurt. It took down the agony slowly, but gradually. Steve thought someone was talking to him but his hearing was completely out of control. He tried to cover his ears with his hands, but instead toppled over sideways and curled into a tight ball, dislodging the warmth in the process. He felt so confused, and the pain still cutting through him was making him want to puke. 

Where was Danny? Where was his Guide? Was he hurt, too? What had happened?

Thoughts tumbled around in Steve’s head, trying to make sense of it all through the haze of the pain and nausea and the complete disorientation. He needed to get a grip. He needed to get his senses under control. He needed to get to Danny, to make sure that he was alright. 

Something happened. The warmth was back, flooding him with calm, though there was something else mixed in with it. The warmth spread up his arms, into his chest, taking away the flaring pain and replacing it with the feeling of cold sticky sweat. 

His primary shield was in tatters, Steve realized, but then suddenly, almost like an afterthought, Danny's steady presence wrapped around him, buffering his shields, pushing down the pain and restoring his dials. 

Thank god, Danny was fine! He was helping him. 

Steve had never been more grateful to Danny than in that moment when he cut down the agony and restored a semblance of control for him. The ringing in his ears subsided with agonizing slowness but Steve still made the attempt to force down the dials to a more normal setting. 

That was when he started to hear Danny talk to him, asking him to focus on Danny, calling him Super SEAL. Steve didn’t feel so super right in that moment, but that didn’t matter. Danny was there and he was unharmed, judging by the chatter he was keeping up. 

“That’s it, buddy. Come on,” Danny coaxed. He sounded a little more relived, at little less tense, but there was anger now entering his voice. “You and I need to have a nice, long talk with the idiots that run this training, I can tell you that. Sonic grenade? Really? Way too much for such a new Sentinel.”

Steve would have liked to comment on that, but he didn’t trust his voice just yet. His throat felt raw, so it was likely he had screamed or made any other kind of noise while he’d been overwhelmed by pain. 

“You back with me, babe? Grunt yes for once, twice for no.”

“’m not grunting,” Steve brought out as he grabbed blindly for more of Danny’s arms, trying to get closer to the source of comfort. Whether or not his Guide did it consciously, the buffering of Steve’s primary shields was doing wonders for him. The pain subsided completely. He regained complete control over his dials, his senses, his composure. 

“Thank you, Danny. God, I wanna punch someone. Or blow them up. Can I blow them up, Danno?” Steve mumbled, the righteous anger Danny felt transmitting easily over the bond. 

Once again he wished he could bury himself in Danny’s embrace, be surrounded by him, his scent, his voice, his shields. He wanted to sink himself into the soothing presence of his Guide. He wanted it so badly. Danny was his safe haven, regardless of that spot inside of Steve Danny couldn’t reach. 

Warmth flooded the bond, bringing something Steve couldn’t name along with it. It didn’t matter anyway. Danny was there, a solid, calming presence in the chaos that had wrecked Steve’s senses just moments ago. As long as Danny was there, everything would be fine. 

“Don’t tempt me. I’m sure there are illicit explosives hidden in the car. But I’ll have some very strongly worded things to say to the Director.” Protectiveness and something else was coloring Danny’s voice, and it made Steve feel warm and grateful. Even though he doubted it was really the Director who had ordered the use of that sonic grenade, but more an overeager training leader who wanted to see what their new Alpha pair could do. Well, that had been an epic fail. 

After a moment of just sitting there being held by Danny, there was a minimal change in Danny’s muscle tone. Something Steve couldn’t quite pinpoint. As if tenseness was creeping into Danny’s posture, slowly but steadily. Had Steve misjudged the situation? Was Danny repulsed by him? By his neediness? By his failure? Would this incident break the frail connection they had, destroy their bond? 

Steve knew that it was likely that he was to blame for this mess. Danny might be angry at the Director and the training people but it was Steve who had failed. Steve who had failed to connect to his Guide, use him as grounding point, tether himself to the person who should by all means and purposes the center of his fucking universe. 

That he hadn’t managed to get that deep, fulfilling connection everyone said they should have was clearly Steve's doing. He hadn’t managed to let Danny in completely. He’d compartmentalized and hidden away the attraction, the _love_ he felt for Danny. Surely that was somehow damaging their bond. Maybe they would never function properly as Sentinel and Guide. 

Guilt crept up Steve’s spine, cold and nasty, and he reluctantly started to disentangle himself from Danny’s soothing embrace. He didn’t deserve it. He was leeching Danny’s strength and exploiting his kindness. Steve really should be ashamed of himself. “I’m sorry, Danny. I’m all better now. Thanks for shoring up my shields - again. I appreciate it. Let's hope I'll do better next time." Steve pulled back from the comforting warmth of his Guide completely.

Danny seemed reluctant to let him go but didn’t really hold him back, either. “You don't need to apologize, goof. This wasn’t your fault.” Danny had raised his voice just a little, but not enough to hurt Steve’s hearing. “I know you assholes are watching! We’re done here. You can take your training field and shove it up your ass! I’m taking Steve home.”

Steve smiled tentatively, relieved that there was at least no awkwardness between them. Danny was defending him, was backing him up, and it was a wonderful feeling, even if Steve knew he didn’t deserve this kindness. 

“Come on, Danny, let’s get out of here.” Steve bent to pick up his discarded shirt, the cooling sweat uncomfortable on his still over-sensitized skin. He just wished he’d gotten to hold onto Danny a little longer. But some things just weren’t his to have.

* * *

Danny knuckled his stinging eyes and turned over in bed for about the hundredth time since lying down. The events of the day - the training, the sonic grenade, the self-doubt - were whirling around in his head, making sleep impossible. 

He should have seen it coming. He should have protected Steve somehow. He should have … should have … should have done what? He didn’t quite know but he really thought he should have done _something_ differently. Danny had rarely felt like such an enormous failure as he had in that moment he’d seen Steve lying on the floor, keening in agony. And it was Danny’s fault. 

His own vision had still been blurry, his ears ringing from the damned sonic grenade, but he knew he needed to help Steve. He’d felt like someone had sucker punched him, but it had to have been a million times worse for Steve, who had had his senses wide open on Danny’s insistence. 

Guilt gnawed at Danny, and doubt. Maybe the counselor had been right to blacklist him, all those years ago. Maybe he just wasn’t suited to be a Guide after all. Maybe it was his fault that Steve couldn’t seem to completely immerse himself in the bond like he was supposed to. Maybe …maybe Danny really was a failure. 

Shame rose in Danny as he recalled how grateful Steve had been for a little comfort, a little support, a hug, the buffering of his shields. It was ridiculous, really, if you thought about it. If Danny had been a decent Guide, had done his job right, it wouldn’t even have come to that. Steve wouldn’t have ended up half-conscious from pain, curled up on the training room floor, desperate for a little relief. When Danny had reinforced his shields, had taken some of the pain and pressure off of him, Steve had been _so fucking grateful_. 

Danny knew he didn’t deserve that. None of it. Especially since Steve seemed to have caught on to Danny’s insecurities. And being insecure, being _not sure_ about something when it came to Steve’s life and well-being just wasn’t acceptable. Danny knew he needed to be confident, needed to be Steve’s rock, his _Guide_ and there was absolutely no room for error. They’d experienced firsthand today what happened when Danny was unsure. 

It was a fucking mess. 

Danny took a deep breath and calmed his mind before reaching out to Steve empathically. He nudged at their bond, gently, but it was no use. Steve had muted down the bond from his side almost completely; shutting Danny out as best as he could, just like he had done every night since the day they had bonded. It was as if Steve didn’t trust himself to leave the bond unguarded in sleep. 

Worry settled into Danny’s gut like ice. The events of the day had been very hard on Steve, and there would surely be backlash from that. But he couldn’t do anything about it if Steve didn’t open up and address the issues; something that was about as likely as a snowstorm in hell. His stubborn Sentinel hated asking for help, even if the incompetence of his own Guide had led to the problems in the first place. 

So Danny was at a loss for what to do. Should he try to talk to Steve? Should he try and get Steve to open up more? It felt like such hypocrisy, considering Danny was hiding away the real depth of his feelings from Steve and not letting him in either. Not that it mattered; Steve didn’t know what he was missing, didn’t know Danny’s core was shielded. There was no reason at all to make him aware now. 

_“Danny!”_ The panicked yell that echoed through the otherwise silent house startled Danny. Steve sounded like he was in trouble. 

Danny threw back the covers and jumped out of bed, running down the hallway to Steve’s bedroom. He paused in the doorframe for a second, taking in the situation. Steve was in bed, helplessly tangled up in the sheets, a fine sheen of sweat covering his naked chest in the moonlight. Even though Steve appeared to be fast asleep, Danny could see the panic on his face, the terror. Steve was caught in what appeared to be a pretty gruesome nightmare. 

“ _Danny. Please, Danny, no-”_ It wasn’t a yell this time, more of a strangled plea, but it tore at Danny’s heart. Whatever it was that Steve was seeing in his nightmare, it had to be horrible. Danny had never heard Steve sound like that before. He sounded defeated, broken, and hopeless. 

With a deep sigh Danny stepped closer to the bed, knowing full well that he needed to untangle Steve from the sheets and get him to calm down. He wasn’t quite sure how to go about it without getting punched in the face though. Steve wasn’t aware of his surroundings, and chances were good he’d come out of his nightmare swinging. The only thing Danny could do was try to make sure that didn’t happen by dropping his shields as much as possible and sending Steve an empathic burst that would hopefully help Steve recognize him. 

Danny reached out, both empathically and physically, and gently placed his hand on Steve’s naked shoulder. Steve flinched, but didn’t react as violently as Danny had feared. It encouraged Danny to tug on the sheet that was entrapping Steve and he pulled decisively. 

Steve whimpered. 

“Shh, it’s okay babe. I’m here, I’ve got you. Everything’s fine. You’re fine. Everything’s gonna be alright. It’s just a dream. Nothing but a dream. Nothing to worry about. You need to wake up now, okay? Come on, babe, open your eyes.” Danny murmured under his breath, worried that if he spoke too loudly Steve would startle anyway. He reached over and cradled Steve’s face in his hands, thumbs stroking over Steve’s cheekbones gently. 

“Come on, Steve. Wake up for me, okay?” Danny mentally nudged against their bond, feeding calm and reassurance into it. If Steve could recognize the fact that Danny was there with him, unharmed and not in danger, maybe Steve could free himself from his nightmare. 

All tension bled out of Steve and he took a deep, shaky breath. A second later his eyes started to flutter open. “Danny?” Steve’s voice was deep and hoarse, roughened from sleep and the nightmare. He seemed to try and focus on Danny, but it was clear that he wasn’t succeeding. 

“Yeah, it’s me. Hey there,” Danny smiled at Steve warmly. He wanted to take his hands away, suddenly acutely aware of the warmth of Steve’s skin, his slight stubble scratching Danny’s palms. This was dangerous territory. He couldn’t allow any of his feelings to transmit to Steve. It would be even more traumatic for Steve if he learned of Danny’s inappropriate thoughts about his Sentinel while he was in this confused, weakened state. 

Steve had a different idea. Strong hands grabbed Danny’s forearms, keeping his hands and fingers in place. 

“Danny.” There was awe in Steve’s voice. And need. So much need. “You’re here.” Apparently Steve didn’t care thathis hands were still gripping Danny’s wrists almost too hard. “You’re okay.”

“Yeah, I’m fine babe.” Danny reassured Steve in a calm voice, and shoved even more calm into their bond. 

“My … Danny …my Guide.” Wonder now. And delight. Steve let go of Danny and scrambled to sit up. “God, Danny, I thought I’d lost you. I thought you’d … there was so much blood. And I couldn’t reach you, couldn’t get to you. Too far. You were way too far away from me and all I could do was listen to your heartbeat slow down and then … then you were gone and I was all alone and I couldn’t get to you … couldn’t reach. I couldn’t reach you. Too late. I was too late and my senses were no good. I messed up and you died and there was blood, so much blood.” 

The pain was back on Steve’s face, the panic in his voice real and sharp and cutting like a blade. 

“It’s all right. I’m fine, see? Not a scratch.” Danny sat down on the bed next to Steve and angled his body so Steve could see him clearly. It didn’t seem to be enough, though. Steve’s breathing was still too fast, his body tense. He made an aborted movement to touch Danny but then didn’t, which wasn’t a good sign at all. This wasn’t working. 

Steve made a distressed sound when Danny got up from the bed again, but Danny was quick to reassure him. “It’s okay babe, I’m not leaving. I’m just going to make us a little more comfortable, okay? I think you need some grounding. I’m getting in with you in a moment so you can tune in all of your senses on me, how does that sound? You good with that?” Danny busied himself with tugging the rest of the sheet from under Steve, untangling it completely, before he made to get into bed with Steve. 

“Yeah, I think I need that. But-” He broke off and looked at Danny for a second, something unreadable rushing over his face. “Can you take off your shirt, Danny?” Steve’s voice was uncertain now, a hint of embarrassment coloring the hesitant words. “I … I need to … I need to make sure that you’re okay.” 

Danny hesitated for a moment. He hadn’t been skin to skin with Steve, not in that way, since he’d first found him, brand new Sentinel senses spiked and out of control in this very bed, weeks ago. Yes, they touched. Yes, Steve grounded his senses on him, like he was supposed to, on a regular basis, but those touches were different. They were more clinical, more … purposeful. Not … this. Whatever this was. But Danny knew he couldn’t deny Steve this, couldn’t withhold his Sentinel his support when he was so obviously shaken and in distress and had very clearly voiced his needs. 

Danny clamped down hard on his feelings of attraction and love, focusing on the overwhelming sense of protectiveness that he had towards Steve, and quickly pulled off the white t-shirt that he’d worn to bed. There was no use in delaying the inevitable and Danny would rather not overthink this. He lifted the covers and even before Danny was fully on the bed, Steve reached for him, pulling Danny down on top of him. 

It was an awkward angle and Danny was pretty sure he was giving Steve bruises somehow, because they hadn’t found a proper way to settle against each other yet, but Steve didn’t seem to notice. He buried his face in the crook of Danny’s neck and inhaled deeply, one of his hands slipping over the back of Danny’s head to hold him still. Danny resisted the urge to move, to shift them around into a more comfortable position. 

“That’s good, Steve. You’re doing great. You can’t smell blood, right? I’m not bleeding.” Danny engaged Steve’s sense of hearing. Steve shuddered and slowly released his hold on Danny, but he didn’t stop touching altogether. All right, scent was taken care of. Danny rolled to his side so he wasn’t still on top of Steve, but it was clear enough that Steve wouldn’t let him go far. Sight and touch were apparently the next items on the list.

Steve’s intense gaze traveled over Danny’s chest, taking in every detail. His hands mapped the planes and angles of his ribcage, his thumbs stroking over Danny’s nipples in a maddening way, making them peak. Danny suppressed a shudder at the erotic touch, fully aware that Steve didn’t intend to turn this into some sort of sensual persuasion game – he was merely making sure that his Guide was indeed unharmed. The attraction, the arousal – that was all Danny’s doing and he felt horrible for it. 

“Guide,” Steve sighed and his hands stilled, apparently satisfied with his assessment of Danny’s chest. Steve had reassured himself that his Guide was not in any danger, and the Sentinel part of him was slowly coming down from the high alert he’d thrown Steve’s body into. It wasn’t really surprising, after the day they’d had, but it also made the fact very clear that this had never been about Danny as a person. Not for one second. This had been about the _Guide_ , not about Danny, the friend. Danny, who unfortunately was ass over teacups in love with his stupidly attractive Sentinel. Not that Steve could ever know that. 

So when Steve turned Danny around to spoon up behind him, wrapping his arm around Danny with a contented sigh, Danny did his best not to let any of his feelings transmit to Steve. He couldn’t risk Steve knowing just how much it hurt to be in bed with him, feeling him, letting Steve ground himself on him, but being seen as nothing more than a _tool_. He just happened to be someone necessary for Steve, for the Sentinel inside of Steve, to function. He’d known that from the get go, had consented to it, had agreed to the platonic bonding, and he’d stupidly believed he’d have his feelings for Steve under control. What a fool he’d been. How could he ever have thought that the little bit of affection Steve was showing towards him, befitting his status as a platonic Guide, would ever be enough? Who had he been trying to fool?

“Yes, Guide,” Danny agreed, the words almost getting stuck inside his throat. In another life, he’d dreamed about having a loving, healthy, sexual bond with his Sentinel. Now Danny only wanted the pain to stop. He’d never get his wish, he knew that now, but suddenly the prospect of having to spend the rest of his life with Steve right in front of him but still hopelessly out of reach, seemed like torture. Danny closed his eyes and held perfectly still. He’d get through this night somehow, even if sleep was impossible. 

Steve hummed in the back of his throat and Danny could feel him brush a chaste kiss onto his neck. Taste, Danny realized. Tears prickled in Danny’s eyes but he willed them away, scared that Steve would be able to smell them, even if he couldn’t see them. It just wouldn’t do to upset Steve now that he’d calmed down again. Steve’s grip on Danny tightened briefly and Danny worried for a second that he hadn’t succeeded in hiding how much he was hurting. But then Steve murmured a last, contented, _”My Guide”_ before his breath evened out and he fell asleep. 

Danny just lay there and stared into the dark. Sleep didn’t come for hours.

* * *

Steve sat down on the couch and watched Danny wander around the room, restlessly. The events of the previous night were hanging between them like thick, wet fog, taking away Steve’s sight of what was important and chilling him to the bone. Something had to change. They couldn’t go on like this. Not when that deep, dark place in Steve’s soul still ached with every breath he took, and the hours Danny had spent in his bed had been the most comforting, yet most painful ones so far. It was a strange feeling, having Danny so close, being wrapped up in his scent, his warmth, the sound of his heart, and yet it felt like he was a thousand miles away, unreachable. 

Elbows propped on his knees, Steve buried his face in his hands for a second before he looked up again and said, “We need to talk about this, Danny.” 

Danny froze mid-step and looked back over his shoulder, his gaze landing on Steve. There was something about him Steve couldn’t read. It might have been apprehension or resignation, Steve didn’t know, but it was perfectly obvious that Danny was as shaken by the events of the previous night as Steve was. 

“Yeah, I know,” Danny agreed with a small nod. He came closer, but didn’t sit down next to Steve on the couch. It was as if he required physical distance for this conversation, while Steve would have preferred to get a chance to hold Danny one last time. But he wouldn’t impose on Danny in that way. 

Steve took a deep breath and decided to just say it. Get it all out in one go, like ripping off a bandaid. “I can’t do this anymore, Danny. It’s not working. I … last night I realized that I’m missing something and I just can’t go on like that. _We_ can’t go on like that. I’m so sorry Danny, but I can’t do this … this platonic thing any more. If nothing else, last night has shown me that I need more physical contact to stabilize my senses.”

Steve felt awful for asking this of Danny. Everything in him rebelled at the thought of pressuring his Guide into any kind of intimacy he didn’t feel comfortable with, but he couldn’t deny his Sentinel side any longer, either. The Sentinel in him was wounded, touch starved and weakened by the closeness of a Guide he could sense and smell and look at but never touch the way he needed. It was slowly driving Steve insane. 

Danny stood perfectly still, his facial expression not giving anything away about what was going on his head. Steve waited for a reaction, any reaction, but so far Danny had yet to give any indication of what he thought about Steve’s proposal. That he hadn’t outright denied him gave Steve hope, but the longer it took for Danny to say something, the slimmer his chances of a good outcome were. 

His suspicions were confirmed when Danny suddenly moved. He turned his back to Steve and rubbed his hands over his face, his whole body suddenly tense. Then he began pacing the length of the room, slowly, his gaze firmly on the floor. “You want a sexual bond, then. I- ” He took a deep, slightly shuddering breath. “I’ll call the Center and have them start a Guide search for a female Guide. It might take a while to find one for an Alpha like you. Until then I hope you can still rely on our bond to see you through. I’ll do my best to accommodate you until we can schedule the counseling and separation period to break our bond.”

He looked at Steve then, and there was so much hurt in Danny’s eyes at that moment that it took Steve’s breath away. For a second Steve didn’t know if the pain that was flaring up in his chest at Danny’s rejection was completely his own, or if he was getting second hand emotions over their bond. 

“I’m sorry that I’ve been failing you. I hope you’ll be happier with another Guide. Someone who can give you what I can’t.” He looked away then, turned his back to Steve and stared out of the window. 

Steve swallowed around the lump in his throat and blinked back the burning in his eyes. “If that’s what you want,” he said, eventually. The thought of having another Guide, sharing his life and his home with someone other than Danny, was horrifying.

Danny’s laugh was harsh and humorless. A painful sound that chafed against Steve like sandpaper against unprotected skin. 

“What I want? Since when has fate or god or whatever you believe in cared for what I wanted?” Danny’s voice was a strange mix of anger and frustration. “Ever since you came online I’ve wanted nothing more than to be your Guide. To be the person you turn to. Your confidante, your partner, your best friend, your …” He broke off then, and looked over his shoulder. His right arm came up and around in a dismissive move and Steve, who had tuned all of his senses firmly in on Danny now caught traces of his scent. It was laden with what Steve finally had learned to identify as _grief_ and _pain_. Underlying that was the scent of salt – the tears he could see Danny fighting so hard. It was odd, that he could smell the body chemicals, the markers for those feelings on Danny’s skin, but he didn’t even get a trace of them over the bond. 

It made no sense. Unless …

“What I want, Steven, is for you to be happy.” Danny said, and while his voice could have lied to Steve, the rest of his body couldn’t. Everything about it was _wrong, wrong, wrong_. Danny was in pain. He was barely holding on, if his elevated heart rate, his scent and his body language were to be believed. And Steve had learned to add up all the clues. 

The resulting picture took him completely by surprise. 

Steve was up and across the room in three long strides, his hands closing around Danny’s arms in an almost bruising grip. Danny stared at him, startled, a deer in headlights look on his face. “What have you done? Daniel, what the hell have you done to our bond?” Steve asked, willing Danny to just speak up and confirm his suspicions. If he was right, if Danny had managed to completely close himself off somehow, it would explain so much. 

Danny yanked himself free from Steve’s grip, confusion and hurt swiftly replaced by anger. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Steven. I haven’t done anything to our bond.” Danny crossed his arms in front of his chest, radiating aggravation now. 

Steve stepped closer to him again, anger burning like fire in his veins. “Don’t lie to me, Guide.” Steve still didn’t even get half of the emotions over the bond that he could pick up through scent and sound and sight. It was as if there were two versions of Danny – one controlled, barely unsettled, emotionally stable one, while underneath there was this other Danny, the one who hurt fiercely and was panicking like a trapped animal. The two versions didn’t match at all. 

“I’m not lying. I didn’t do anything to our bond. It’s exactly the way it was when we first created it. I didn’t _do anything_ to it since then.” Danny’s eyes were ablaze with barely concealed panic, but Steve realized with a start that he was telling the truth. 

Not a lie. Not a lie. 

_Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth._

“Christ, Danny. You have no idea what you’ve done, have you?” Steve asked around his burning throat, as the last puzzle piece slotted into place. He knew he sounded broken, but the realization of what was wrong with their bond hit him like a kick to the stomach. Danny just stared at him in confusion. 

“There’s this place inside of me,” Steve began and just talking about it brought the pain to the surface with renewed strength. “It’s dark and raw and it’s been hurting ever since we bonded. At first … at first I thought it would get better once we’d gotten used to the bond. Or that the imprint maybe would change something. There’s this spot where your mental touch just doesn’t reach. It feels incomplete, wrong, sore. I thought maybe it was me, maybe I just couldn’t let you in and that it was my own damn fault that I didn’t get the magical ‘safe haven’ and ‘two halves of a whole’ gig I’d been promised. But it was you all along. You denied me. You denied me part of yourself. Why the hell did you do that, Danny?” Steve wanted nothing more than to understand where they had gone wrong. 

Danny’s heart rate skyrocketed and all color drained from his face. A fine sheen of sweat broke out all over his skin and Steve’s senses were swamped with a cloying mix of panic, regret and pain. It was everywhere; in Danny’s scent, his expression and even flooding the bond. Steve felt like he would suffocate on so much misery. 

“I didn’t know,” Danny stammered. “Please, I swear, I didn’t know you would be able to feel that I was holding something back. You have to believe me. I’d never do anything to hurt you. I didn’t know… I didn’t know.” He was running his hands over his face and through his hair, ruffling up his usually neat and tidy look until his outward expression matched his inner state of mind. 

Steve still didn’t know why Danny had done it, though. 

“Why, Danny? Just tell me why,” Steve pressed. He needed to know. Deserved to know what had happened that Danny had decided to cheat them both out of the bond they could have had. 

“Because of you!” Danny suddenly yelled. “Because of what you said. You asked me to be your Guide, _platonically_. You practically ordered me to do it. You said it was logical. We’re best friends. We work well together. That it made sense. But bonding is _intimate_ , Steven. Ther’s a reason why most bonds between Sentinel and Guide are sexual. A proper bond creates a sort of intimacy that goes beyond anything you can imagine.” Danny was back to pacing, his voice agitated and full of pain and self-loathing. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I was trying to protect you.” 

“Protect me?” Steve asked in bewilderment. “Protect me from what exactly, Danny?” 

“Yeah, from what exactly, I wonder, Steven.” Sarcasm now. “I don’t know. Maybe I thought it wouldn’t be such a great idea to let my career military, straight as an arrow best friend-turned-Sentinel know that I’ve been having wet dreams about him for months. Maybe I thought knowing that I’ve jerked off to fantasies about you would make things awkward and really uncomfortable between us. Or maybe, just maybe, I was worried that you’d reject me if you knew; appalled by the thoughts and dreams you would be subjected to and I would lose you altogether. I love you Steven. I’m in love with you. I couldn’t lose you, not over this. So I thought I’d agree to the platonic bonding and be content with what you were willing to give. I hoped that it would be enough.” He turned away from Steve again, his gaze dropping to the floor. He seemed to deflate right in front of Steve’s eyes. 

“But hey, I wasn’t so far off the mark, was I?” Danny’s voice was barely above a whisper now. He sounded hurt and a little bitter. Resigned. “Here we are and you just told me you want a sexual bond with someone else, after all. So please, don’t go all self-righteous anger on me. I made a mistake. I apologize. It was the wrong thing to do.” He made a small gesture with his hand that Steve couldn’t quite identify. He was too busy trying to breathe around the hope blooming in his chest. 

Steve took a moment to process all that Danny had just told him. Danny loved him. Danny had been afraid of losing him. Danny felt the same attraction Steve did. Danny had, in his own, twisted way, tried to protect him. Steve couldn’t blame him for anything he’d done. Not really. Not when all it would have taken was a proper talk between two adults. They’d both been so fucking blind and so protective of each other that they hadn’t even managed to have one simple conversation. 

Danny had moved to stand in front of the window. As Steve watched he placed his right forearm against the frame and leaned his forehead onto his wrist, his eyes falling closed. He looked utterly defeated, and the acidic odor of misery that clung to his skin almost made Steve’s stomach turn. 

Time to set things straight. Steve walked over to Danny and stood behind him. Danny didn’t turn or acknowledge his presence at all. Slowly, Steve placed his hands on Danny’s shoulders. Danny flinched as if he’d been struck, but still didn’t turn around. He just stood there, tense, unhappy, in pain. Letting Steve do whatever. 

“We’re both idiots,” Steve said softly, and began to rub gentle circles into the damp skin at the nape of Danny’s neck. “I’m not as straight as you think, and I wasn’t trying to tell you I want to find a female Guide so I can have sex with her. I was trying – without much success, I might add – to tell you that I want to have sex with you, Danny. I wasn’t looking for another Guide; I already have the one I want and I’m not giving you up.”

Danny’s head came up from where it had been resting against his arm and he half turned to Steve, his eyes guarded. “If this is some sort of joke-” he started, but Steve pressed a finger to his lips, silencing him. 

“No joke,” Steve said, seriously. “I’m not out to hurt you, Danny.” Steve got the impression it would take more than pretty words to convince Danny that he was telling the truth. He turned Danny around completely so they faced each other and Danny came willingly, all resistance gone from him. “Can you feel me over our bond, Danny?” Steve asked hesitantly. He wasn’t quite certain if the mention of their faulty connection would do more harm than good. 

“You know I can,” Danny answered and looked away, his gaze dropping to the floor. 

Steve would have none of it. “Hey, come on, look at me, Danny,” he coaxed and after a second, Danny complied. “How about you use the bond to read me? _Feel_ me, Danny. It’s okay. This is what bonds are about, right?”

Danny stared at him for a moment but then his eyes slowly drifted shut. Steve made the conscious effort to relax, to let Danny in and let him explore as he pleased. He didn’t hold anything back, didn’t even guard that place he had denied Danny until that very moment, too afraid that Danny would see it as a failure on his part. When Danny brushed the edges of it, skirting the outlines of that raw, sore spot, Steve almost flinched. 

“I’m sorry I hurt you,” Danny whispered, and there was regret coloring his voice. 

“Doesn’t matter anymore, Danny. We’re gonna fix it. We’ll be fine, I promise.” Steve said and he leaned over and brushed a chaste kiss against Danny’s lips, before he could stop himself. 

Danny’s eyes flew open. 

“You kissed me!” Danny sounded more startled than Steve thought reasonable. 

“Yeah, and I’d like to do it again if that’s okay with you,” Steve said and cupped Danny’s face with his right hand. “But before we do anything else, babe, we need to take a shower. Your scent is all over the place and it’s starting to become a problem. Until we can fix this bond I need all the clues I can get about how you’re feeling. So, what do you say? Want me to wash your back?” 

A tiny smile curled the corner of Danny’s mouth. “Yeah, all right, let’s take a shower. But then I’d like to go back to kissing.” Steve thought Danny actually blushed as he said that. 

Steve laughed. “I think that can be arranged.”

* * *

Warm water was running down Danny’s back, taking the last of his tension away. Steve had kept his word and was gently washing him, his soaped up hands currently making tiny circles across Danny’s chest. It was distracting and arousing and did nothing at all to make Danny stay in control of his feelings. Steve didn’t seem to mind in the least. There was a contented little smile playing around his lips and he was completely immersed in his task of soaping every inch of Danny’s body. 

Danny let his head sink to his chest until the stream of hot water was hitting his neck and shoulders just right. He closed his eyes in contentment. This was feeling so damn good all around. Danny didn’t want to think about what would come next, still unsure if the fragile thing that was developing between him and Steve would actually lead anywhere. It wasn’t that Danny still thought Steve had been trying to yank his chain, but until they had fixed the bond a bit of unease would linger. 

“Don’t,” Steve murmured, and pressed a tiny kiss against Danny’s collarbone. “Don’t think about it, Danno. Just feel. I want to make you feel so good.” 

Danny looked up into Steve’s eyes – his Sentinel’s eyes – and found nothing but warmth in his gaze. It made Danny’s skin tingle with excitement. On his chest, Steve’s soapy hands were slowly moving lower, fingertips dancing around his belly button in a fluttery, barely there touch. It was maddening. 

Steve stepped closer to him, their bodies almost touching as his left hand came to rest on Danny’s right hipbone while his right hand continued its downward slope. Steve’s fingertips were brushing the curls of Danny’s pubic hair and for a second Steve’s gaze sought his, questioning. 

“This okay, Danny?” Steve asked. His hand was hovering over Danny’s crotch, not yet touching his cock or balls. 

“Yeah, more than okay,” Danny replied in a slightly shaky voice. He wanted to be touched by Steve so badly. He had fantasized and dreamed and _wanted_ for such a long time now. To have those dreams become reality was thrilling and scary at the same time. 

The bond between them thrummed in a different kind of way now, and Danny wasn’t quite sure what was happening. It shouldn’t change yet, from just some simple touching. Then again, maybe it wasn’t the sex itself that was changing the bond, but Danny. Somewhere along the way, when he’d been touched so lovingly by Steve, Danny had started to loosen the iron grip he held on the shields that protected his innermost feelings. The part he had held back from Steve during their bonding, and that had inadvertently hurt his Sentinel more than Danny had ever thought possible. 

His trail of thought was cut short when Steve’s soapy hand wrapped around Danny’s cock, big and strong and absolutely perfect. Danny groaned, his knees going weak. He reached out to steady himself and found Steve had wrapped his arm around him, keeping him safe. 

“Hmmm, maybe we should move this party to bed,” Steve murmured into Danny’s ear, and nibbled the lobe playfully. It sent a shiver down Danny’s spine, and for a moment his mind went completely blank. This was pure bliss. Steve’s hard body pressed against his own, his gentle hands on his skin, his _presence_ shiny and sparkling, shifting like a kaleidoscope in the sun – Danny had never felt more alive than in that moment. 

Danny let himself be maneuvered more directly under the warm spray of the shower again, this time to rinse off the suds Steve’s hands had left all over his body. Steve kept touching him, gently cleaning away any residue of the shower gel he’d used before shutting off the shower and reaching for one of the huge, fluffy towels. A moment later Danny was wrapped in the soft fabric and Steve began to dab him dry. Steve was taking his time, kissing and touching at random, but never allowing Danny’s arousal to get too high. Danny’s hazy brain helpfully supplied that his Sentinel probably kept tabs on his heart rate, respiration, muscle tone, and a million other things that let him determine just when to back off a bit so that Danny wouldn’t come too soon. 

It was a weirdly exciting thought. 

“I can’t wait to taste you all over,” Steve said, and licked at Danny’s collarbone before biting down on his neck, gently. “And I’ll mark you, Danny. You okay with that?” There was a possessive undertone in Steve’s voice that had Danny’s breath catching in his throat, and the blood rushing in his ears. 

“Whatever you want is fine with me, babe,” Danny replied and it wasn’t a lie. He’d give himself over to Steve without a second thought. No holding back anymore. No regrets. Danny looked Steve in the eyes and slipped a hand onto his still wet hipbone. “Mark me. Claim me. Whatever your Sentinel, whatever _you_ need, I’m down with it. I’m all yours.”

“I like the sound of that. Mine.” Danny could feel Steve’s smile against the skin of his throat. “Fair warning, I’m not going to give you up again.” The statement was followed by a sharp nip to Danny’s jaw. 

Danny huffed out a small laugh. Yeah, that was Steve being a possessive bastard alright. “Didn’t think you would.” 

Steve took a step back and dried himself off cursorily. He let the towel fall to the floor and took Danny’s hand, his face suddenly serious. “Good, now that we’ve got that settled, I get to do a proper imprint on you, Guide. That thing with the goblet was a bad joke. God Danny, you have no idea how much I’ve wanted to really taste you. It’s been driving me completely crazy.” He tugged Danny to the bed and crawled onto it, bringing Danny along. 

“I think I may actually have a clue what that felt like. You got lube?” Danny had to ask. He’d hate to get this started, waiting for Steve to finally fuck him, only to realize that there was no lube. He wasn’t about to test the theory that one could actually die from blue balls. 

“Yeah, I’ve used it to jerk off because I wasn’t allowed to touch you the way I wanted to. I thought about you, imagined the way you would feel around my cock, or fucking me, hard. I wanted that so badly, but it only made the ache inside of me worse. I can’t believe I thought we would be okay with a platonic bond, when we’ve been so much more than that even before this whole Sentinel and Guide thing started.” Steve twisted around and grabbed a tube of lube from out of his bedside table, dropping it next to Danny’s hip. 

Danny shuddered. The thought of Steve pleasuring himself, his hand wrapped around his own cock, fingers up his ass … the mental picture alone almost brought Danny to the edge. He still felt slightly guilty for having put Steve through this all because of a misunderstanding, but the past needed to be the past now. They were starting over. Danny couldn’t think of a better way than letting Steve have his way with him. And it wasn’t as if Steve was the only one with a few magic tricks up his sleeve. Danny was still shielded to an extent and he had never deliberately _projected_ his feelings onto anyone – keeping up his shields to the fullest at all time had been the only way to live. But that was in the past, too. Danny couldn’t wait for Steve’s reaction when he would feel the purposeful projection of Danny’s own pleasure for the first time. 

Wiggling a bit, Danny rolled onto his back and settled comfortably: legs sprawled, arms loosely at his side, head propped on one of the pillows. He would just give Steve time to taste and touch and explore as much as he wanted. There was no hurry. Grinning up at Steve, Danny said, “Do your worst.” 

“Only the best for my Guide,” Steve replied, and kneeled next to Danny on the bed. Danny realized at that moment that there actually would be a completely new imprint and not just amazing bonding sex, so he closed his eyes and tried to quiet his breathing at least a little. 

Careful hands were running over his body, caressing, teasing, always staying on the right side of tickling. It felt like Steve was leaving a burning trail all over Danny’s body, and at times Danny was almost torn between trying to get away from the strange sensation of being mapped and catalogued by Sentinel senses and the urge to arch into the loving touch. 

In no time, Danny floated in a haze of arousal. Steve’s hands were working their magic without pushing him too far. It was an almost surreal sensation to be touched so reverently; even with his eyes closed Danny could feel Steve’s intense focus on him. The sudden soft, wet touch of Steve’s tongue to his collarbone took Danny completely by surprise. He gasped, eyes snapping open and Danny could feel Steve chuckle softly against his skin. 

“You were getting a bit lost,” Steve whispered. “Thought I’d see if I can get your full attention back.” He suddenly moved to straddle Danny’s hips, but didn’t put his full weight onto him. “I’m gonna taste every inch of your skin. You’re mine. All mine.” The possessive tone was back, along with unconcealed arousal. Steve’s voice was like a caress against Danny’s skin. 

“All yours, yes.” Danny agreed readily. He turned his head to the side, giving Steve better access to the place he was nosing and pressing kisses against. The lick at the juncture of neck and shoulder sent tingling sparks of arousal down Danny’s spine and his whole body arched against Steve. 

“Mine!” Steve repeated, a growl this time.

Before Danny had the chance to process what was happening Steve put his hands onto Danny’s shoulders and pressed them firmly down onto the mattress. The bite to the side of his neck that followed was somewhat painful and overwhelmingly pleasurable at the same time. Danny groaned, but couldn’t really move away from the bruising, biting mouth; Steve made sure of that. 

“Hold still, Danny,” Steve said. “Don’t struggle. I don’t want to hurt you. I just need to mark you right.” He sucked at the same spot again, worrying the tender skin with his teeth, pulling blood up to the surface. It was a proper claiming mark and the slight scarring after it healed would make it perfectly clear to other Sentinels that they should better stay away from Danny, because his Sentinel was a possessive bastard who was unwilling to share. 

“Whatever you need, Sentinel,” Danny repeated his earlier words. His inner Guide was yielding to the Sentinel staking his claim, pleased that he’d been deemed worthy by his mate. He’d do whatever it took to make Steve feel secure and confident about their bond and their relationship. This was how it should have been from the start. 

“Need to taste you,” Steve said, and then did just that. He started to lick and nip and suck on Danny’s skin randomly. Danny couldn’t really see any pattern, it was Steve just tasting whatever part of Danny he took interest in at that moment. The lobe of his ear, a nipple, the crook of his neck or the inside of his elbow. He tongued Danny’s belly button and kissed his way up Danny’s ribcage and into the pit of his arms. Danny’s arms were lifted and gently pressed above his head; Steve’s whispered ‘keep them there’ sent a thrill down Danny’s spine. 

His whole body was on fire. Coherent thought was fleeing him as Steve kept up his random caresses and kisses, his mouth, hands, tongue all blurring into a constant thrum of arousal that made Danny’s head spin. He couldn’t work out the logistics of it all, too immersed in the feelings Steve evoked in him. Danny’s whole world narrowed down to his connection with Steve. Steve seemed to be determined to really taste Danny all over, and when he reached the juncture of leg and groin, Danny’s breath hitched in anticipation, everything about Steve suddenly sharp and crystal clear. He wanted Steve’s mouth on his cock so badly. 

Steve’s hands moved under the back of Danny’s knees and pushed, Danny’s thighs coming to rest against his chest as he was exposed to Steve’s gaze completely. When Steve leaned down, it wasn’t to take Danny’s cock into his mouth though. Instead Danny could feel Steve’s hot breath against his balls, before Steve’s tongue lapped at the skin, sending Danny into a spiral of need and want. He cried out, coming apart beneath Steve’s mouth. 

A second later Steve had moved on, his lips leaving a burning trail of heat all over Danny’s sensitized skin. Before Danny could really register what was happening, Steve had given his legs another little push and plunged his tongue straight into Danny’s ass. Danny felt like he was going insane. 

“Steve,” he gasped, unable to put in words what feeling Steve’s tongue was inciting. Helpless under the onslaught of emotions as Steve kept licking and sucking and tonguing his rim, Danny let go of the last of his shields and poured all of his emotions into the bond. His love, his excitement, the feeling of overwhelming pleasure Steve was giving him. Then he deliberately pushed the sensation of being rimmed back at Steve, projecting it onto his Sentinel’s body. 

Steve tensed and made a startled, breathy sound. “Danny?” he asked, a look of wide-eyed astonishment on his face. 

Danny grinned. “It’s called projection. I thought I’d let you feel exactly what you’re doing to me.” 

Steve panted and dropped his face into the crook of Danny’s hip, right next to his hard cock. “Jesus, Danny, I had no idea you could do that. I never imagined… I can’t believe I didn’t realize how much you love me. How … perfect you are for me. I can’t…” Steve shuddered and pressed his face into Danny’s damp skin, making him go crazy with arousal just from the breath ghosting over his sensitized skin. 

“I’d love you even more if you could hurry up and get to the actual fucking, babe,” Danny panted and concentrated on pushing as much pleasure as he could back onto Steve. Time to shake the cool of his Sentinel a bit. 

Steve groaned and licked a quick stripe along Danny’s cock, obviously completely thrown by the dual sensations. “Danny you gotta stop this or it’s gonna be over before we get to the actual fucking. Although…” he nipped at Danny’s hipbone and Danny thought he’d go crazy with lust, “… I guess that way I at least to get to mark you by coming all over you.” Steve probably had wanted to sound playful, but ended up sounding breathless. 

Danny laughed. “You’re such a caveman. Really classy, babe, really classy.”

“I love you, Danny,” Steve suddenly said and Danny’s heart skipped a beat. What the hell? He mock-insulted Steve and got a love declaration out of it?

“I love you too, you know that, right?” Danny replied and he pushed all the love, all the feelings that he had such a hard time voicing into the bond. With his shields down and his heart wide open, Danny threw everything he had into his connection with Steve. 

Steve smiled the most blinding smile at him, and the bond between them suddenly seemed to be charged with energy. Something was happening, but Danny wasn’t quite sure what. He wrapped himself around Steve empathically and was momentarily blinded by the love and acceptance that wasn’t just transmitting over the bond, but was all around Steve, filling him completely. 

There was a shift, like a dam breaking, and a second later Danny could feel their bond flare and settle, nothing at all separating them anymore. He’d given Steve access to all of himself, embracing Steve’s mind with his own, and he’d been welcomed in Steve’s mind in return. The bond was nothing like it had felt before. That broken, almost useless connection was a thing of the past, and Danny basked in Steve’s beautiful aura for a second, completely overwhelmed by the intimate closeness of a true bond. 

“I can feel you,” Steve whispered, and he sounded awed. 

Danny laughed. “I sure as hell hope you can, babe.”

Steve pulled a face. “Don’t be like that. You know what I mean. Our bond; it’s finally … it’s finally right. I can feel you inside of my head. You took away that sore spot. You … you completed me.” 

“Sap.” As much as Danny loved that Steve was suddenly all romantic and emotional, he really, really wanted an orgasm. Now.

“All right, all right, I get it. On with the show.” Steve reached for the lube and Danny heaved a sigh of relieve. He’d finally get Steve to fuck him. 

Only Steve’s fingers didn’t return to his ass. Danny frowned, wondering what Steve had in mind and then groaned when he saw Steve reach behind himself. 

“Babe, what are you doing? Are you trying to kill me?”Danny thought it was a valid question. The image of Steve fingering himself open was not helping with Danny’s growing arousal whatsoever. Only, he’d sort of assumed that Steve would be topping, especially after the expertly executed rim job he’d been treated to. 

“No, I just realized that I want to ride you. I want to feel you inside of me in every way possible. You’re inside of my mind, joined with me through our bond and I just … I need you closer, okay? That all right with you? I promise I’ll fuck you so good.”

Danny groaned and fisted the sheets in a helpless attempt to get his arousal under control. Steve really was planning on killing him it seemed. “Of course that’s fine with me, Steve. Just … do something already, okay?” He sent a burst of _needwantsoclose_ through the bond, knowing Steve would get the idea. Danny was pretty sure his Sentinel had stopped tracking his vitals right around the time Danny had started projecting. If he’d had the energy Danny would have smiled smugly – damn he was good. 

“You’re so bossy, Danny. What happened to the guy who was willing to give me up so I could have sex with someone else?” Steve’s tone was teasing and with all the love flowing through their bond Danny didn’t even pretend to get angry at the low blow Steve had dealt. 

“He’s off to find a Sentinel who doesn’t keep him waiting, you cock tease.” Danny said. 

“Only a cock tease if I don’t follow through,” Steve replied and a second later a slick hand wrapped around Danny’s cock, holding him still. Danny watched in fascination as Steve lowered himself on the cock he was still holding, sinking down way faster than Danny had anticipated. 

The world greyed out a little around the edges. This was everything he had ever dreamt of and more. Feelings and thoughts seemed to swirl around them as he and Steve were finally joined in every possible way. One body, one mind. 

It was intoxicating. It was bliss. It was … perfection. 

Danny lost track of time but it didn’t matter. He was finally whole, _they_ were whole, and everything was as it was supposed to be. 

Sentinel and Guide had been united.

* * *

Epilogue: Six weeks later. 

Steve fastened the last straps of his tac-vest, watching out of the corner of his eyes as Danny did the same. The bond between them was wide open and thrumming with energy, Danny’s presence calm and comforting even though they were likely headed into a fight. Chin and Kono were in the other room, gearing up as well. 

Maya and Tigger appeared in a flash of psionic energy and Danny turned to greet them. “Hey there, you come to watch the show? Can’t wait to get these guys locked up. I hate people who sell other people like they’re property.” Danny scratched Tigger behind the ears and gave Maya a one-armed hug. The gentle Gorilla had shown up the morning after their _real_ bonding, and Danny had cried relieved, helpless tears as he got to touch his spirit animal again for the first time since he’d been a teenager. 

Tigger chuffed and trotted over to Steve, headbutting him, asking to be petted. Steve grinned and obliged him. His spirit animal was so affectionate. He might look badass but he was more like a cuddly kitty most of the time. Maya was a real mother hen and fiercely protective of both him and Danny, which came a bit as a surprise to Steve, but he wouldn’t complain. It was such an honor to have her come visit and support them, he’d never take her presence for granted.

“Hey girl, what do you say, let’s go get ourselves some bad guys?” Steve grinned at Maya and high-fived her when she raised her hand. She made a small gesture, something Steve hadn’t learned to decipher yet – ASL for spirit animals wasn’t really something you picked up on the go – but that Steve took as agreement. 

“All right babe, let’s do this.” Danny checked his weapon and then threw Steve a glance. “Levels?”

Steve smiled. He was in perfect control of his senses now, thanks to Danny and the impossibly strong bond they shared. Still, Danny never failed to ask anyway. “I’m solid, Danny. Nothing to worry about. Come on, let’s roll.” 

“After you, Alpha Sentinel McGarrett,” Danny’s grin was just this side of dirty and clearly indicated he just wanted to stare at Steve’s ass. Steve laughed. He really loved this guy. 

Life was great.

End


End file.
